Messageboard Joke Marathon
Sunday, January 19, 2003 by Mr_Ph00ey2u | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Ok...bring on your best or worst but leave everyone laughing 
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
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Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #242 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:27 PM
Reply #242 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:27 PM
Actually I'm part of a devious plot to keep you from getting anything done!
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #243 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:35 PM
Reply #243 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:35 PM
TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds
7. Fat clothes
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time
5. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell
4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow
3. Eyelash curlers
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made
And the number One thing only women understand:
1. OTHER WOMEN
10. Cats' facial expressions
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds
7. Fat clothes
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time
5. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell
4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow
3. Eyelash curlers
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made
And the number One thing only women understand:
1. OTHER WOMEN
kthxbye
Reply #244 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:37 PM
Reply #244 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:37 PM
I knew it, I knew it!
It's even more effective than me finding a near clone for every theme I half-create in Hoverdesk!
It's even more effective than me finding a near clone for every theme I half-create in Hoverdesk!
bordfryr
Reply #245 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:39 PM
Reply #245 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:39 PM
I saw this on the internet a few weeks ago:
Two men go hunting in the woods one day. All of a sudden, one of them falls down, his eyes roll back in his head and he just lies there motionless. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. "Help me! My friends dead!!"
The 911 operator says " Okay, now just try to calm down. I can help you get through this. First, lets make sure your friend is dead."
"Well, okay." said the man. There are a few moments of silence, then the operator hears a gunshot. The man comes back on the phone and says "Okay, now what?"
Two men go hunting in the woods one day. All of a sudden, one of them falls down, his eyes roll back in his head and he just lies there motionless. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. "Help me! My friends dead!!"
The 911 operator says " Okay, now just try to calm down. I can help you get through this. First, lets make sure your friend is dead."
"Well, okay." said the man. There are a few moments of silence, then the operator hears a gunshot. The man comes back on the phone and says "Okay, now what?"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #246 Saturday, January 25, 2003 12:00 AM
Reply #246 Saturday, January 25, 2003 12:00 AM
I strive to be effective!
Speaking of clones...
What do you get when you cross Britney Spears with a sheep. Virgin wool.
What is a clone child's biggest fear. I'm turning into my parents.
Why would you clone Osama Bin Laden. So you can kill him twice.
Why did Kevin Eubanks have himself cloned. So he could have someone to hold after sex.
Why did Shaquille O'Neal have himself cloned. So when he misses a free throw he'll get the rebound.
What did Jesse Jackson say when he came out against cloning? What fun is cloning without the moaning.
What do you call a Backstreet Boys clone. N'Sync.
How can you tell a Michael Jackson clone is real. 'Cause the clone doesn't look anything like him.
Why do the Detroit Lions want a clone? So they would have somebody they could beat.
What does a clone call a turkey baster, a microscope, and tweezers? A family reunion.
Why is it easy for scientists to clone Hillary Clinton? The eggs are already frozen.
Speaking of clones...
What do you get when you cross Britney Spears with a sheep. Virgin wool.
What is a clone child's biggest fear. I'm turning into my parents.
Why would you clone Osama Bin Laden. So you can kill him twice.
Why did Kevin Eubanks have himself cloned. So he could have someone to hold after sex.
Why did Shaquille O'Neal have himself cloned. So when he misses a free throw he'll get the rebound.
What did Jesse Jackson say when he came out against cloning? What fun is cloning without the moaning.
What do you call a Backstreet Boys clone. N'Sync.
How can you tell a Michael Jackson clone is real. 'Cause the clone doesn't look anything like him.
Why do the Detroit Lions want a clone? So they would have somebody they could beat.
What does a clone call a turkey baster, a microscope, and tweezers? A family reunion.
Why is it easy for scientists to clone Hillary Clinton? The eggs are already frozen.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #247 Saturday, January 25, 2003 1:18 AM
Reply #247 Saturday, January 25, 2003 1:18 AM
Some One-Liners...
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
If you ain't makin' waves, you ain't kickin' hard enough!
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
Wear short sleeves - Support your right to bare arms!
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
If you ain't makin' waves, you ain't kickin' hard enough!
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
Wear short sleeves - Support your right to bare arms!
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #248 Saturday, January 25, 2003 1:32 AM
Reply #248 Saturday, January 25, 2003 1:32 AM
Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911.
The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator.
Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."
The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"
There was a long pause and finally Bubba said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street, and you pick her up there?"
The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator.
Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."
The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"
There was a long pause and finally Bubba said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street, and you pick her up there?"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #249 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:33 AM
Reply #249 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:33 AM
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet.
The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money.
Many people had tried over time (weight-lifters, truck drivers, etc.) but nobody could do it. One day this scrawny little man came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny squeaky voice "I'd like to try the bet"
After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man.
But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass.
As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight- lifter, or what?"
The man replied "I work for the IRS."
Calling it a night...say goodnight Gracie
The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money.
Many people had tried over time (weight-lifters, truck drivers, etc.) but nobody could do it. One day this scrawny little man came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny squeaky voice "I'd like to try the bet"
After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. Then he handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man.
But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass.
As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the $1000, and asked the little man, "What do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight- lifter, or what?"
The man replied "I work for the IRS."
Calling it a night...say goodnight Gracie
Weaksid
Reply #250 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:40 AM
Reply #250 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:40 AM
Man, I thought I didn't have a life
I think he went way beyond the amount of jokes in my collection.
I think he went way beyond the amount of jokes in my collection.
DPG
Reply #251 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:46 AM
Reply #251 Saturday, January 25, 2003 2:46 AM
Two old ones:
There are three types of people:
1. Those who can count.
2. Those that can't.
Arguing on the internet is like competing in
the special olympics--even if you win you're
still retarded!
There are three types of people:
1. Those who can count.
2. Those that can't.
Arguing on the internet is like competing in
the special olympics--even if you win you're
still retarded!
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #253 Saturday, January 25, 2003 5:08 PM
Reply #253 Saturday, January 25, 2003 5:08 PM
SQ Hell?? Speaking of Computer Viruses and Worms, here's some to watch for
ADAM AND EVE VIRUS Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple computer.
AIRLINE VIRUS You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T VIRUS Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
BOBBIT VIRUS Removes a vital part of your hard disk then re-attaches it. (But that part will never work again.)
CHICAGO CUBS VIRUS Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS #1 The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS #2 Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything.
DAN QUAYLE VIRUS #1 Prevents your system from spawning any child process without joining into a binary network.
DAN QUAYLE VIRUS #2 Their is sumthing rong wit your komputer, ewe jsut cant figyour out watt!
ELVIS VIRUS Your computer gets fat, slow and lazy, then self-destructs -- only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.
FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of your computer.
FREUDIAN VIRUS Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
GALLUP VIRUS Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin or error).
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS It starts by boldly stating, "Read my docs ... no new files!" on the screen. It proceeds to fill up all the free space on your hard drive with new files, then blames it on the Congressional Virus.
GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
HEALTH CARE VIRUS Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong and sends you a bill for $4,500.
IMELDA MARCOS VIRUS Sings you a song (slightly off key) on boot-up, then subtracts money from your Quicken account and spends it all on expensive shoes it purchases through Prodigy.
JIMMY HOFFA VIRUS your programs can never be found again.
KEVORKIAN VIRUS Helps your computer shut down as an act of mercy.
LAPD VIRUS It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defense."
MARIO CUOMO VIRUS It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.
MCI VIRUS Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
NEW WORLD ORDER VIRUS Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
NEW YORK GIANTS VIRUS Makes your P4 machine perform like a 286/AT.
O.J. VIRUS It claims that it did not, could not and would not delete two of your files and vows to find the virus that did it.
OLLIE NORTH VIRUS Causes your printer to become a paper shredder.
OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB.
ORAL ROBERTS VIRUS Claims that if you don't send it a million dollars, its programmer will take it back.
PAUL REVERE VIRUS This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack -- once if by LAN, twice if by C/:
PBS VIRUS Your computer stops every few minutes to ask for money.
POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.
ROSS PEROT VIRUS Activates every component in your system, just before the whole damn thing quits.
SEARS VIRUS Your data won't appear unless you buy new cables, power supply and a set of shocks.
STAR TREK VIRUS Invades your system in places where no virus has gone before.
TED TURNER VIRUS Colorizes your monochrome monitor.
TEXAS VIRUS Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
ADAM AND EVE VIRUS Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple computer.
AIRLINE VIRUS You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER VIRUS Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T VIRUS Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
BOBBIT VIRUS Removes a vital part of your hard disk then re-attaches it. (But that part will never work again.)
CHICAGO CUBS VIRUS Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS #1 The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS #2 Runs every program on the hard drive simultaneously but doesn't allow the user to accomplish anything.
DAN QUAYLE VIRUS #1 Prevents your system from spawning any child process without joining into a binary network.
DAN QUAYLE VIRUS #2 Their is sumthing rong wit your komputer, ewe jsut cant figyour out watt!
ELVIS VIRUS Your computer gets fat, slow and lazy, then self-destructs -- only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.
FEDERAL BUREAUCRAT VIRUS Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of your computer.
FREUDIAN VIRUS Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
GALLUP VIRUS Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin or error).
GEORGE BUSH VIRUS It starts by boldly stating, "Read my docs ... no new files!" on the screen. It proceeds to fill up all the free space on your hard drive with new files, then blames it on the Congressional Virus.
GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
HEALTH CARE VIRUS Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong and sends you a bill for $4,500.
IMELDA MARCOS VIRUS Sings you a song (slightly off key) on boot-up, then subtracts money from your Quicken account and spends it all on expensive shoes it purchases through Prodigy.
JIMMY HOFFA VIRUS your programs can never be found again.
KEVORKIAN VIRUS Helps your computer shut down as an act of mercy.
LAPD VIRUS It claims it feels threatened by the other files on your PC and erases them in "self-defense."
MARIO CUOMO VIRUS It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.
MCI VIRUS Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
NEW WORLD ORDER VIRUS Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
NEW YORK GIANTS VIRUS Makes your P4 machine perform like a 286/AT.
O.J. VIRUS It claims that it did not, could not and would not delete two of your files and vows to find the virus that did it.
OLLIE NORTH VIRUS Causes your printer to become a paper shredder.
OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then slowly expands back to 200MB.
ORAL ROBERTS VIRUS Claims that if you don't send it a million dollars, its programmer will take it back.
PAUL REVERE VIRUS This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack -- once if by LAN, twice if by C/:
PBS VIRUS Your computer stops every few minutes to ask for money.
POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
RIGHT TO LIFE VIRUS Won't allow you to delete a file, regardless of how old it is. If you attempt to erase a file, it requires you to first see a counselor about possible alternatives.
ROSS PEROT VIRUS Activates every component in your system, just before the whole damn thing quits.
SEARS VIRUS Your data won't appear unless you buy new cables, power supply and a set of shocks.
STAR TREK VIRUS Invades your system in places where no virus has gone before.
TED TURNER VIRUS Colorizes your monochrome monitor.
TEXAS VIRUS Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #254 Saturday, January 25, 2003 6:13 PM
Reply #254 Saturday, January 25, 2003 6:13 PM
New Medications
S t . M o m ' s W o r t
Plant extract that treats mom's depression
by rendering preschoolers unconscious for
up to six hours.
______________________________
E m p t y N e s t r o g e n
Highly effective suppository that eliminates
melancholy by enhancing the memory of how
awful they were as teenagers and how you
couldn't wait till they moved out.
______________________________
P e p t o b i m b o
Liquid silicone for single women.
Two full cups swallowed before an evening out
increases breast size, decreases intelligence,
and improves flirting.
______________
D u m e r o l
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause
dangerously low I.Q., causing enjoyment
of country western music.
_____________________________
S t . M o m ' s W o r t
Plant extract that treats mom's depression
by rendering preschoolers unconscious for
up to six hours.
______________________________
E m p t y N e s t r o g e n
Highly effective suppository that eliminates
melancholy by enhancing the memory of how
awful they were as teenagers and how you
couldn't wait till they moved out.
______________________________
P e p t o b i m b o
Liquid silicone for single women.
Two full cups swallowed before an evening out
increases breast size, decreases intelligence,
and improves flirting.
______________
D u m e r o l
When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause
dangerously low I.Q., causing enjoyment
of country western music.
_____________________________
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #255 Saturday, January 25, 2003 7:47 PM
Reply #255 Saturday, January 25, 2003 7:47 PM
Ebonic 10 Commandments
1. I be God. Don' be dissing me.
2. Don' be makin hood ornaments outa me or nothin in my crib.
3. Don' be callin me for no reason - homey don' play that.
4. Y'all betta be in church on Sundee.
5. Don' dis ya mama... an if ya know who ya daddy is, don' dis him
neither.
6. Don' ice ya bros.
7. Stick it to ya own woman.
8. Don' be liftin no goods.
9. Don' be frontin like you all that an no snitchin on ya homies.
10. Don' be eyein' ya homie's crib, ride, or nuffin. #a1
1. I be God. Don' be dissing me.
2. Don' be makin hood ornaments outa me or nothin in my crib.
3. Don' be callin me for no reason - homey don' play that.
4. Y'all betta be in church on Sundee.
5. Don' dis ya mama... an if ya know who ya daddy is, don' dis him
neither.
6. Don' ice ya bros.
7. Stick it to ya own woman.
8. Don' be liftin no goods.
9. Don' be frontin like you all that an no snitchin on ya homies.
10. Don' be eyein' ya homie's crib, ride, or nuffin. #a1
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #257 Saturday, January 25, 2003 8:27 PM
Reply #257 Saturday, January 25, 2003 8:27 PM
Miss Bee was in her 80s, and much admired for her sweetness and
kindness to all.
The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in spring,
and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She invited him
to have a seat while she prepared a little tea. As he sat facing
her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl
sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated,
of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine
his curiosity! Surely Miss Bee had flipped...or something! But
he certainly couldn't mention the strange sight in her parlor.
When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The
pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and
its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he
could resist no longer.
Miss Bee," he said, pointing to the bowl, "I wonder if you would
tell me about this." "Oh yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful?
I was walking downtown last fall, and I found this little
package. It said to put it on the organ and keep it wet, and it
would prevent disease.
And you know, I think it's working...
I haven't had a cold all winter!"
kindness to all.
The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in spring,
and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She invited him
to have a seat while she prepared a little tea. As he sat facing
her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl
sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated,
of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine
his curiosity! Surely Miss Bee had flipped...or something! But
he certainly couldn't mention the strange sight in her parlor.
When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The
pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and
its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he
could resist no longer.
Miss Bee," he said, pointing to the bowl, "I wonder if you would
tell me about this." "Oh yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful?
I was walking downtown last fall, and I found this little
package. It said to put it on the organ and keep it wet, and it
would prevent disease.
And you know, I think it's working...
I haven't had a cold all winter!"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #258 Saturday, January 25, 2003 8:37 PM
Reply #258 Saturday, January 25, 2003 8:37 PM
Actual Newspaper Headlines.
GATORS TO FACE SEMINOLES WITH PETERS OUT
The Tallahassee Bugle
MESSIAH CLIMAXES IN CHORUS OF HALLELUJAHS
The Anchorage Alaska Times
THANKS TO PRESIDENT CLINTON, STAFF SGT. FRUER NOW HAS A SON
The Arkansas Plainsman
CLINTON PLACES DICKEY IN GORE'S HANDS
Bangor Maine News
CLINTON STIFF ON WITHDRAWAL
The Bosnia Bugle
ORGAN FESTIVAL ENDS IN SMASHING CLIMAX
San Antonio Rose
PETROLEUM JELLY KEEPS IDLE TOOLS RUST-FREE
Chicago Daily News
TEXTRON INC. MAKES OFFER TO SCREW COMPANY STOCKHOLDERS
The Miami Herald
MARRIED PRIESTS IN CATHOLIC CHURCH A LONG TIME COMING
The New Haven Connecticut Register
GOVERNOR CHILES OFFERS RARE OPPORTUNITY TO GOOSE HUNTERS
The Tallahassee Democrat
GATORS TO FACE SEMINOLES WITH PETERS OUT
The Tallahassee Bugle
MESSIAH CLIMAXES IN CHORUS OF HALLELUJAHS
The Anchorage Alaska Times
THANKS TO PRESIDENT CLINTON, STAFF SGT. FRUER NOW HAS A SON
The Arkansas Plainsman
CLINTON PLACES DICKEY IN GORE'S HANDS
Bangor Maine News
CLINTON STIFF ON WITHDRAWAL
The Bosnia Bugle
ORGAN FESTIVAL ENDS IN SMASHING CLIMAX
San Antonio Rose
PETROLEUM JELLY KEEPS IDLE TOOLS RUST-FREE
Chicago Daily News
TEXTRON INC. MAKES OFFER TO SCREW COMPANY STOCKHOLDERS
The Miami Herald
MARRIED PRIESTS IN CATHOLIC CHURCH A LONG TIME COMING
The New Haven Connecticut Register
GOVERNOR CHILES OFFERS RARE OPPORTUNITY TO GOOSE HUNTERS
The Tallahassee Democrat
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #259 Saturday, January 25, 2003 9:01 PM
Reply #259 Saturday, January 25, 2003 9:01 PM
With Pleasure
I guess some things will never change. I hired a temp while my secretary
was on maternity leave. Trying to arrive at an agreeable wage, I asked
what she expected to earn.
She said, "Well... the minimum I could work for is four hundred a week."
I told her I'd give her that much with pleasure.
She shook her head and replied, "With pleasure, it'll be $600 a week."
I guess some things will never change. I hired a temp while my secretary
was on maternity leave. Trying to arrive at an agreeable wage, I asked
what she expected to earn.
She said, "Well... the minimum I could work for is four hundred a week."
I told her I'd give her that much with pleasure.
She shook her head and replied, "With pleasure, it'll be $600 a week."
Angel_Wings
Reply #260 Saturday, January 25, 2003 9:03 PM
Reply #260 Saturday, January 25, 2003 9:03 PM
Ph00ey...you're too much! Where do you find these?
Angel_Wings gives George a bright, flashy, innocent Gracie smile
Angel_Wings gives George a bright, flashy, innocent Gracie smile
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Reply #241 Friday, January 24, 2003 11:23 PM