Messageboard Joke Marathon
Sunday, January 19, 2003 by Mr_Ph00ey2u | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Ok...bring on your best or worst but leave everyone laughing 
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
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Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #202 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:00 PM
Reply #202 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:00 PM
The pastor of a church began his sermon with this story:
"I was on a plane last week, flying from Chicago to California,
when we ran into some very severe turbulence.
As it got worse, the passengers became more and more alarmed, and
finally even the flight attendants began to look concerned. Finally, one
of them noticed that I had 'Rev.' in front of my name on the passenger
list, came over to me, and said, 'Sir, this is really frightening. Do
you suppose you could...I don't know...do something religious?'"
"So I took up a collection."
"I was on a plane last week, flying from Chicago to California,
when we ran into some very severe turbulence.
As it got worse, the passengers became more and more alarmed, and
finally even the flight attendants began to look concerned. Finally, one
of them noticed that I had 'Rev.' in front of my name on the passenger
list, came over to me, and said, 'Sir, this is really frightening. Do
you suppose you could...I don't know...do something religious?'"
"So I took up a collection."
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #204 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:12 PM
Reply #204 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:12 PM
Two men waiting at the Pearly Gates strike up a conversation.
"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second man.
"You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes.
But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping.
How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me,
so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone,
knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died."
The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.
"What do you mean?" asks the first man.
"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive!"
"How'd you die?" the first man asks the second.
"I froze to death," says the second.
"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"
"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second man.
"You get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes.
But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping.
How about you, how did you die?"
"I had a heart attack," says the first man. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me,
so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone,
knitting. I ran down to the basement, but no one was hiding there, either. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died."
The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic," he says.
"What do you mean?" asks the first man.
"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive!"
Weaksid
Reply #206 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:38 PM
Reply #206 Thursday, January 23, 2003 11:38 PM
PhOOey, hey I was wondering about the linkage.. Are you refering the ones that don't light up and go anywhere?> If it is. That's because I didn't finish it and added anything under there 
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #207 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:15 AM
Reply #207 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:15 AM
Gotcha! 
Iben wished to purchase a gift for his new
sweetheart's birthday, as they had not been dating for long.
After careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves
would strike the right romantic note, but not too personal.
Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he went to
Sears and bought a pair of white gloves. The younger sister
purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the
wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got
the gloves and the sweetheart got the panties.
Without checking the contents, he sealed the package and
mailed it to his sweetheart along with this note:
Darling,
I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the
habit of wearing any when we go out in the evenings. If it
had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long
ones with buttons, but she wears short ones that are easy to
remove.
These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from
showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three
weeks and they were hardly soiled, I had her try yours on for
me and she looked really smart.
I wish I were there to put them on you for the first time,
as no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before
I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off,
remember to blow in them before putting them away, as they
will naturally be a little damp from wearing.
Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming
year. I hope you will wear them for me on Friday night.
All my love,
Iben
Calling it a night...Say goodnight, Gracie, wherever you are.
Iben wished to purchase a gift for his new
sweetheart's birthday, as they had not been dating for long.
After careful consideration, he decided a pair of gloves
would strike the right romantic note, but not too personal.
Accompanied by his sweetheart's younger sister, he went to
Sears and bought a pair of white gloves. The younger sister
purchased a pair of panties for herself. During the
wrapping, the clerk mixed up the items and the sister got
the gloves and the sweetheart got the panties.
Without checking the contents, he sealed the package and
mailed it to his sweetheart along with this note:
Darling,
I chose these because I noticed that you are not in the
habit of wearing any when we go out in the evenings. If it
had not been for your sister, I would have chosen the long
ones with buttons, but she wears short ones that are easy to
remove.
These are a delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from
showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three
weeks and they were hardly soiled, I had her try yours on for
me and she looked really smart.
I wish I were there to put them on you for the first time,
as no doubt other hands will come in contact with them before
I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off,
remember to blow in them before putting them away, as they
will naturally be a little damp from wearing.
Just think how many times I will kiss them during the coming
year. I hope you will wear them for me on Friday night.
All my love,
Iben
Calling it a night...Say goodnight, Gracie, wherever you are.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #208 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:42 PM
Reply #208 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:42 PM
Signs Someone Has Hacked Into Your Email Account
~ "Honey, why is an 18-wheeler from Amazon.com backing into our driveway?"
~ One Secret Service agent is sitting on your head while another is cuffing you.
~ Apparently, your flame war with Don [email protected] is about to turn ugly.
~ When you log on, your computer cheerily greets you: "You've got lawsuits!"
~ Your inbox is filled with doggie porno and you're *strictly* a sheep porno kind of guy.
~ You're suddenly getting more Spam than the Hormel Outlet Store.
~ Sotheby's says the Rembrandt is yours and that you now owe them $71,000,000.
~ Terse "Knock it off, Oedipus" email from your Mom.
~ Your wife calls you at the office to report that Pogdi, your Pakistani mail-order bride, has arrived.
~ "Honey, why is an 18-wheeler from Amazon.com backing into our driveway?"
~ One Secret Service agent is sitting on your head while another is cuffing you.
~ Apparently, your flame war with Don [email protected] is about to turn ugly.
~ When you log on, your computer cheerily greets you: "You've got lawsuits!"
~ Your inbox is filled with doggie porno and you're *strictly* a sheep porno kind of guy.
~ You're suddenly getting more Spam than the Hormel Outlet Store.
~ Sotheby's says the Rembrandt is yours and that you now owe them $71,000,000.
~ Terse "Knock it off, Oedipus" email from your Mom.
~ Your wife calls you at the office to report that Pogdi, your Pakistani mail-order bride, has arrived.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #209 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:52 PM
Reply #209 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:52 PM
A nun was going to Chicago. She went to the airport and sat down waiting for her flight. She looked over in the corner and saw one of those weight machines that tells your fortune.
So, she thought to herself "I'll give it a try just to see what it tells me."
She went over to the machine and put her nickel in, and out came a card that said, "You're a nun you weigh 128lbs and you are going to Chicago, Illinois." She sat back down and thought about it. She told herself it probably tells everyone the same thing, but decided to try it again.
She went back to the machine and put her nickel in. Out came a card that read, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you're going to Chicago, Illinois and you are going to play a fiddle." The nun said to herself, "I know that's wrong, I have never played a musical instrument a day in my life."
She sat back down. From nowhere a Cowboy came over and set his fiddle case down next to her. The nun picked up the fiddle and just started playing beautiful music.
Startled, she looked back at the machine and said, "This is incredible. I've got to try it again." Back to the machine. She put her nickel in and another card came out. It said, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you're going to Chicago, Illinois and you're going to break wind.
Now, the nun knows the machine is wrong; "I've never broken wind in public a day in my life!" Well, she tripped, fell off the scales and broke wind. Stunned, she sat back down and looked at the machine.
She said to herself, "This is truly unbelievable! I've got to try it again."
She went back to the machine, put her nickel in an collected the card. It said, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you have fiddled and farted around and missed your flight to Chicago!"
So, she thought to herself "I'll give it a try just to see what it tells me."
She went over to the machine and put her nickel in, and out came a card that said, "You're a nun you weigh 128lbs and you are going to Chicago, Illinois." She sat back down and thought about it. She told herself it probably tells everyone the same thing, but decided to try it again.
She went back to the machine and put her nickel in. Out came a card that read, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you're going to Chicago, Illinois and you are going to play a fiddle." The nun said to herself, "I know that's wrong, I have never played a musical instrument a day in my life."
She sat back down. From nowhere a Cowboy came over and set his fiddle case down next to her. The nun picked up the fiddle and just started playing beautiful music.
Startled, she looked back at the machine and said, "This is incredible. I've got to try it again." Back to the machine. She put her nickel in and another card came out. It said, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you're going to Chicago, Illinois and you're going to break wind.
Now, the nun knows the machine is wrong; "I've never broken wind in public a day in my life!" Well, she tripped, fell off the scales and broke wind. Stunned, she sat back down and looked at the machine.
She said to herself, "This is truly unbelievable! I've got to try it again."
She went back to the machine, put her nickel in an collected the card. It said, "You're a nun, you weigh 128lbs., you have fiddled and farted around and missed your flight to Chicago!"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #210 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:54 PM
Reply #210 Friday, January 24, 2003 12:54 PM
Up at the head table in the cafeteria, one of the nuns had placed
a big bowl of bright red, fresh, juicy apples. Beside the bowl,
she placed a note which read, "Take only one. Remember, God is watching."
At the other end of the table was a platter full of freshly baked
chocolate chip cookies, still warm from the oven.
Beside the platter with the cookies was a little note scrawled in a
child's handwriting which read, "Take all you want. God's watching
the apples."
a big bowl of bright red, fresh, juicy apples. Beside the bowl,
she placed a note which read, "Take only one. Remember, God is watching."
At the other end of the table was a platter full of freshly baked
chocolate chip cookies, still warm from the oven.
Beside the platter with the cookies was a little note scrawled in a
child's handwriting which read, "Take all you want. God's watching
the apples."
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #212 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:00 PM
Reply #212 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:00 PM
Pat and Mike work at the Guinness Brewery, and one day there's an accident.
Pat calls Mike's wife, Mary, and says: "Sure, and I hate to be tellin ya this,
but there's been an accident down at the Guinness."
"Saints Preserve us," says she, "is Mike alright?"
Pat responds, "I'd like to tell ya that, but it'd be a lie!"
"Ya don't mean that me Mike's been hurt?" says Mary.
"Sure, an it's worse than that," says Pat, "he's fallen inta the beer vat and drowned!"
"Oh, well" says Mary, "At least it was quick, ya know he couldn't swim a lick!"
"Oh, I wish I could be tellin ya that," says Pat, "but it's be a lie...
He got out three times ta pee!"
Pat calls Mike's wife, Mary, and says: "Sure, and I hate to be tellin ya this,
but there's been an accident down at the Guinness."
"Saints Preserve us," says she, "is Mike alright?"
Pat responds, "I'd like to tell ya that, but it'd be a lie!"
"Ya don't mean that me Mike's been hurt?" says Mary.
"Sure, an it's worse than that," says Pat, "he's fallen inta the beer vat and drowned!"
"Oh, well" says Mary, "At least it was quick, ya know he couldn't swim a lick!"
"Oh, I wish I could be tellin ya that," says Pat, "but it's be a lie...
He got out three times ta pee!"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #213 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:07 PM
Reply #213 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:07 PM
Just ONE Wish...
werewolf was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp.
He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah.
This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can
forget about three... You only get one wish!"
werewolf sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii,
but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete -- how much steel!! No, think of another wish."
werewolf said "OK, I will try to think of a really good wish". Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women, know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment, know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say "nothing," know how to make them truly happy."
The genie said, "Do you want that bridge to be two lanes or four?"
Lunch is over...get back to work
werewolf was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp.
He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie.
The genie said, "OK, You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah.
This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can
forget about three... You only get one wish!"
werewolf sat, and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii,
but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?"
The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible!!! Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete -- how much steel!! No, think of another wish."
werewolf said "OK, I will try to think of a really good wish". Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women, know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment, know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say "nothing," know how to make them truly happy."
The genie said, "Do you want that bridge to be two lanes or four?"
Lunch is over...get back to work
werewolf
Reply #214 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:11 PM I've heard that one as a conversation with God.
Reply #214 Friday, January 24, 2003 1:11 PM
I've heard that one as a conversation with God.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #215 Friday, January 24, 2003 4:22 PM
Reply #215 Friday, January 24, 2003 4:22 PM
A Protestant died and was sent to hell. A few seconds after arriving, the Devil appeared in a cloud of smoke and said, "Hey Bill, Welcome to Hell! Here's the keys to your Porsche.
Let's go visit your beachhouse!" Before the befuddled man could answer, the Devil whisked him
into the Porsche and off they went. Arriving at the beachhouse, the man could only stare in awe at the magnificent mansion before him. The Devil handed the keys to
the mansion and the sportscar to the man whose mouth was hanging open in amazement and said, " Well, Bill, I'll check up on you in two weeks. Enjoy!" And as suddenly as he had
appeared, the devil disappeared.
His incredulity fading somewhat, Bill went into the mansion and found everything to be first class with running servants, an indoor pool ... the whole nine yards. For two weeks, he
lived like a king. After two weeks had elapsed, the Devil suddenly appeared and
asked the man, "Well, Bill, how is Hell treating you? Great place, isn't it! By the way, I have another client to see so I can't stay. Any problems? We aim to please down here in
Hell."
Bill replied that he certainly was having a grand time and that he'd not been prepared for such royal treatment. In fact, he had been expecting Dante's Inferno or something
similar. The Devil laughingly replied "No, Bill. Those are just old wives tales. This is the way Hell really is! Great place, isn't it?"
Bill then said that everything was fine except that at night, he'd been hearing these terrible blood-curdling screams emanating from the nearby island out in the ocean. This was so disturbing that he'd had to take an occasional sleeping pill. He then leaned over and whispered to the Devil, "Tell me really. Is that what's in store for me? After all, this IS Hell."
The Devil could not stop laughing at this and with tears streaming down his eyes, he said "No, you've got it all wrong. Those people on the island are the Catholics. They DEMAND it!"
Let's go visit your beachhouse!" Before the befuddled man could answer, the Devil whisked him
into the Porsche and off they went. Arriving at the beachhouse, the man could only stare in awe at the magnificent mansion before him. The Devil handed the keys to
the mansion and the sportscar to the man whose mouth was hanging open in amazement and said, " Well, Bill, I'll check up on you in two weeks. Enjoy!" And as suddenly as he had
appeared, the devil disappeared.
His incredulity fading somewhat, Bill went into the mansion and found everything to be first class with running servants, an indoor pool ... the whole nine yards. For two weeks, he
lived like a king. After two weeks had elapsed, the Devil suddenly appeared and
asked the man, "Well, Bill, how is Hell treating you? Great place, isn't it! By the way, I have another client to see so I can't stay. Any problems? We aim to please down here in
Hell."
Bill replied that he certainly was having a grand time and that he'd not been prepared for such royal treatment. In fact, he had been expecting Dante's Inferno or something
similar. The Devil laughingly replied "No, Bill. Those are just old wives tales. This is the way Hell really is! Great place, isn't it?"
Bill then said that everything was fine except that at night, he'd been hearing these terrible blood-curdling screams emanating from the nearby island out in the ocean. This was so disturbing that he'd had to take an occasional sleeping pill. He then leaned over and whispered to the Devil, "Tell me really. Is that what's in store for me? After all, this IS Hell."
The Devil could not stop laughing at this and with tears streaming down his eyes, he said "No, you've got it all wrong. Those people on the island are the Catholics. They DEMAND it!"
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #216 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:21 PM
Reply #216 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:21 PM
A woman suspects her husband is cheating on her. One day she calls home and a strange woman answers.
Wife: Who is this?
Maid: This is the maid.
Wife: We don't have a maid.
Maid: I was hired this morning by the man of the house.
Wife: Well, this is his wife. Is he there?
Maid: He's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I assumed was his wife.
The wife is fuming. She says to the maid... "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?
Maid: What will I have to do?
Wife: I want you to take my gun from the desk and shoot him and the woman he's with. The maid puts the phone down. The wife hears footsteps and the gunshots, then more footsteps.
Maid: What do I do with the bodies?
Wife: Just drag them out and throw them in the swimming pool.
Maid: But there's no pool here....(A long pause)
Wife: Is this 832-4821?
Wife: Who is this?
Maid: This is the maid.
Wife: We don't have a maid.
Maid: I was hired this morning by the man of the house.
Wife: Well, this is his wife. Is he there?
Maid: He's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I assumed was his wife.
The wife is fuming. She says to the maid... "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?
Maid: What will I have to do?
Wife: I want you to take my gun from the desk and shoot him and the woman he's with. The maid puts the phone down. The wife hears footsteps and the gunshots, then more footsteps.
Maid: What do I do with the bodies?
Wife: Just drag them out and throw them in the swimming pool.
Maid: But there's no pool here....(A long pause)
Wife: Is this 832-4821?
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #217 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:57 PM
Reply #217 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:57 PM
Q. What do you call a monk who has had a sex-change operation in order to become a nun?
A. A transsister.
I know..booooo!!!
A. A transsister.
I know..booooo!!!
deleted
Reply #218 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:08 PM
Reply #218 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:08 PM
I recently recieved this by e-mail:
THE YEAR'S BEST [ACTUAL] HEADLINES OF 2002
Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
I'm loving these jokes. Keep 'em coming!
THE YEAR'S BEST [ACTUAL] HEADLINES OF 2002
Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
I'm loving these jokes. Keep 'em coming!
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #219 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:15 PM
Reply #219 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:15 PM
Important link for the War on Terrorism
The U.S. Navy initiates it's new Terrorist Catch and Release Program
http://www.solarnight.com/toons/catch_and_release.jpg
The U.S. Navy initiates it's new Terrorist Catch and Release Program
http://www.solarnight.com/toons/catch_and_release.jpg
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #220 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:51 PM
Reply #220 Friday, January 24, 2003 7:51 PM
Fred and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year. Every
year Fred would say, "Edna, I'd like to ride in that there
airplane." And every year Edna would say, "I know Fred, but
that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten
dollars."
One year Fred and Edna went to the fair and Fred said, "Edna,
I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I
may never get another chance."
Edna replied, "Fred that there airplane ride costs ten dollars,
and ten dollars is ten dollars."
The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll make you a
deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet
for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you,
but if you say one word it's ten dollars."
Fred and Edna agreed and up they go. The pilot does all kinds
of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard.
He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word. They
land and the pilot turns to Fred, "By golly, I did everything
I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't."
Fred replied, "Well, I was going to say something when Edna
fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."
year Fred would say, "Edna, I'd like to ride in that there
airplane." And every year Edna would say, "I know Fred, but
that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten
dollars."
One year Fred and Edna went to the fair and Fred said, "Edna,
I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I
may never get another chance."
Edna replied, "Fred that there airplane ride costs ten dollars,
and ten dollars is ten dollars."
The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll make you a
deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet
for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you,
but if you say one word it's ten dollars."
Fred and Edna agreed and up they go. The pilot does all kinds
of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard.
He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word. They
land and the pilot turns to Fred, "By golly, I did everything
I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't."
Fred replied, "Well, I was going to say something when Edna
fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."
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Reply #201 Thursday, January 23, 2003 10:58 PM