Look to Your Left.....
That's your weapon for the upcoming zombie apocalypse
Sunday, September 19, 2010 by G3mpi3 | Discussion: Community
Well it seems my weapon of choice is a glass thermometer - Looks like I'm not going to last long.....
What's your "weapon of choice" (item currently to your left)? 
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Reply #42 Sunday, September 26, 2010 10:20 AM
Yeah...feisty kittens can rip you to itty bitties.
Reply #43 Monday, September 27, 2010 2:25 AM
That would be different to a pussy.... which would curl up on a zombie's lap and watch TV with it.
Hmmm, maybe I should get me a little pussy after all. 
Reply #44 Monday, September 27, 2010 7:18 AM
Naughty naughty. which is better. A little bald pussy cat or a big hairy one? oops...wrong game.
Reply #45 Monday, September 27, 2010 8:53 AM
As I recall, there is a breed of cat that's almost furless... don't know the name offhand, but those sassy Persians must've jumped the queue when the fur wos getting handed out.
Reply #46 Monday, September 27, 2010 3:01 PM
That's like saying when God wuz handin' out brains some thought he said trains and took the first one out of town.
Reply #47 Monday, September 27, 2010 9:59 PM
I know a 'sh!thead' who got in the wrong queue when the brains were being handed out.... he ended up with a second bowel instead.
Can well imagine, then, that he'd be off the menu when the zombies are feasting on brains.
There's nothing worse than a sh!t sandwich... cos no matter how thick you slice the bread.... 
Reply #48 Monday, September 27, 2010 10:25 PM
There's some crust, wot? 
Lotsa love to your kitteh, Syd. 
"I never saw a wild thing
sorry for itself.
A small bird will drop frozen dead from a bough
without ever having felt sorry for itself.
- e.e. cummings
Reply #49 Monday, September 27, 2010 11:12 PM
Or we could introduce them to a Cheech and Chong special. A two foot doobie with more shit than herb in it. They can smoke and choke and forget all us real people.
Reply #51 Monday, September 27, 2010 11:55 PM
There's some crust, wot?
You know how some kids (spoiled brats) won't eat a sandwich unless the crust is cut off? Well in the case of a sh!t sandwich, I'd eat the crust (after cutting it off) and throw the sandwich away.
Talking about sandwiches and pussies.... I had a pussy (tasted just like chicken) sandwich once. 
Won't go to that Chinese takeaway again. 
Reply #52 Tuesday, September 28, 2010 6:53 AM
I wouldn't even eat the crust. Knowing where it came from would be enough of a turn off and the smell.......no no no.
Reply #53 Tuesday, September 28, 2010 8:00 AM
Ah, but you forget who you're talking to! As you would know from my starkerbarks, I am more than used to "the smell". 
Anyhow....
To my left I now have a half bottle of mineral turpentine and some cotton wool /buds. The idea is to clean off some felt marking pen from some DVD storage envelopes I wanna reuse for other titles, but if a Zombie were to interrupt I could always poke a couple of turps saturated cotton buds in its eyes so it can't see to eat me. I mean, it can't eat if it can't find the silverware, right?
Reply #54 Tuesday, September 28, 2010 10:58 PM
I thought Zombies were way to sophisticated to use silverware. They use their fingers if they can keep them from falling into the soup.
Reply #55 Wednesday, September 29, 2010 10:33 AM
Yeah, I thought that too, but they quit using their fingers when they discovered that they were eating more fingers than eyeballs or brains.... hence the silverware, well for those still with fingers to pick it up, that is,
Oh, and the silverware also helps prevent fingers falling off in the soup... which is a bonus for non-zombie dinner guests.
Reply #56 Wednesday, September 29, 2010 1:50 PM
This is true, but let us not forget Zombies have been around a long time and could very well have learned how to disguise themselves as normal people giving the amount of cranial matter they consume.
Balls
Reply #58 Thursday, September 30, 2010 11:04 PM
I never though of it like that, but they'd probably be detected as zombies by their greying flesh and leaving their vegetables on the side of the plate.
Oh well, you'll know what's set up camp in your back yard if Butch comes in with a decaying arm or leg.
Reply #59 Sunday, October 3, 2010 8:08 PM
Zombie Outbreak has occurred! Have whatever is to your left ready to do battle. All hands......Battle stations. I got my Starbucks coffee cup and its fully loaded. To arms...to arms. Or not. 
Reply #60 Sunday, October 3, 2010 8:42 PM
Oh very funny! I tried looking to my left but my chair kept spinning around in circles! Hah! hah! I ain't falling for that one again! 
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Reply #41 Saturday, September 25, 2010 4:43 AM
thanks for the kitten wishes guys.....
she lives on a chair to left of my puter chair....so...she's still there....and a little better today.... so, watch out zombies......