Messageboard Joke Marathon
Sunday, January 19, 2003 by Mr_Ph00ey2u | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Ok...bring on your best or worst but leave everyone laughing 
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
Joke Rulez
1. Let's keep them PG. WC is a Family Place.
2. Links to Funny Pics or Flash files are welcome.
3. Throwing fruit and veggies at bad jokes is encouraged!
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Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #623 Saturday, February 22, 2003 12:35 PM
Reply #623 Saturday, February 22, 2003 12:35 PM
Why I'm so Tired
For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax buildup, poor blood, or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.
Here's why:
The population of this country is 273 million.
140 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government, leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing the Taliban.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And there you are sitting on your butt, at your computer, reading jokes.
Nice, real nice... no wonder I'm tired
For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep, not enough sunshine, too much pressure from my job, earwax buildup, poor blood, or anything else I could think of. But now I found out the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.
Here's why:
The population of this country is 273 million.
140 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal government, leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing the Taliban.
Which leaves 16.2 million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments.
And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals, Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And there you are sitting on your butt, at your computer, reading jokes.
Nice, real nice... no wonder I'm tired
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #624 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:27 PM
Reply #624 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:27 PM
In honor of our friends stuck in the hospital...a few hospital jokes
Fuzzy & Wom...don't read these till you're healed...I'm sure it will hurt to laugh for awhile!
Hospital Charts
Actual writings on hospital charts:
1. She has no rigors or shaking chills , but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
13. She is numb from her toes down.
14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
15. The skin was moist and dry.
16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid. (yikes!)
19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
24. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
25. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
26. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
27. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
28. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
29. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
Fuzzy & Wom...don't read these till you're healed...I'm sure it will hurt to laugh for awhile!
Hospital Charts
Actual writings on hospital charts:
1. She has no rigors or shaking chills , but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
6. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
8. The patient refused autopsy.
9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
10. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.
12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
13. She is numb from her toes down.
14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
15. The skin was moist and dry.
16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid. (yikes!
) 19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
24. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.
25. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
26. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
27. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
28. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
29. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #625 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:36 PM
Reply #625 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:36 PM
True Medical Stories
A man come into the ER yelling, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" The ER physician grabs his stuff, rushes out to the cab, lifts the lady's dress, and just finishes
jerking off her underwear when he suddenly discovers that there are several cabs lined up, and it's obvious that he's in the wrong one.
A nurse at the beginning of the shift places her stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's chest wall. "Big breaths," instructed the nurse.
"Yes, they used to be," remorsed the patient.
One day I had to be the bearer of bad news and I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he died from a "massive internal fart."
I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right eye with your hand." He read
the 20/20 line perfectly. "Now your left." Again, a flawless read. "Now both," I requested. There was silence. He couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and
discovered that he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam.
A nurses' aide was helping a patient into the bathroom when the patient exclaimed, "You're not coming in here with me. This is only a one-seater!"
During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed his doctor that he was having trouble with one of his medications. "Which one?", asked the
doctor "The patch," he replied, "the nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and I've run out of places to put it!" The doctor had him quickly undress and discovered what
he hoped he wouldn't see . . . Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long since you have been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered, "Why, not for about twenty years . . . when my husband was still alive."
A nurse caring for a woman asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't get used to the taste," the patient replied. The nurse asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet plainly labeled "KY Jelly." (Don't eat the Jelly, Wom!)
A man come into the ER yelling, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" The ER physician grabs his stuff, rushes out to the cab, lifts the lady's dress, and just finishes
jerking off her underwear when he suddenly discovers that there are several cabs lined up, and it's obvious that he's in the wrong one.
A nurse at the beginning of the shift places her stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's chest wall. "Big breaths," instructed the nurse.
"Yes, they used to be," remorsed the patient.
One day I had to be the bearer of bad news and I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he died from a "massive internal fart."
I was performing a complete physical, including the visual acuity test. I placed the patient twenty feet from the chart and began, "Cover your right eye with your hand." He read
the 20/20 line perfectly. "Now your left." Again, a flawless read. "Now both," I requested. There was silence. He couldn't even read the large E on the top line. I turned and
discovered that he had done exactly what I had asked; he was standing there with both his eyes covered. I was laughing too hard to finish the exam.
A nurses' aide was helping a patient into the bathroom when the patient exclaimed, "You're not coming in here with me. This is only a one-seater!"
During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed his doctor that he was having trouble with one of his medications. "Which one?", asked the
doctor "The patch," he replied, "the nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and I've run out of places to put it!" The doctor had him quickly undress and discovered what
he hoped he wouldn't see . . . Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body! Now the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long since you have been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered, "Why, not for about twenty years . . . when my husband was still alive."
A nurse caring for a woman asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't get used to the taste," the patient replied. The nurse asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet plainly labeled "KY Jelly." (Don't eat the Jelly, Wom!)
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #626 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:42 PM
Reply #626 Saturday, February 22, 2003 2:42 PM
You Know You've Joined A Cheap HMO When . . .
10. Your annual breast exam is conducted at Hooters.
9. Directions to your doctor's office include, "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."
8. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
7. The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
6. The only item listed under Preventive Care coverage is "An apple a day."
5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
4. "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo.
3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
2. Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.
1. You ask for Viagra; you get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.
10. Your annual breast exam is conducted at Hooters.
9. Directions to your doctor's office include, "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."
8. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
7. The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
6. The only item listed under Preventive Care coverage is "An apple a day."
5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
4. "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo.
3. The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
2. Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.
1. You ask for Viagra; you get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #628 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:29 PM
Reply #628 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:29 PM
Bad? I copied off my HMO benefit package!
Weaksid
Reply #629 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:41 PM
Reply #629 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:41 PM
YOU KNOW YOU'RE LIVING IN THE YEAR 2003 WHEN:
a. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is because they
do not have a e-mail address.
b. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
c. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so
she can create a screen saver.
d. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if
anyone is home.
e. Every commercial on television has a web site address at the bottom of
the screen.
f. You buy a computer and 3 months later it is out of date and now
sells for half the price you paid.
g. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the
first 20 or 30 years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.
h. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase
would be a hassle and take planning.
i. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.
j. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.
k. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.
l. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.
m. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.
n. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.
o. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
p. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your
coffee.
q. You wake up at 2 AM to go to the bathroom and check your E- mail on your way back to bed.
r. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
s. You're reading this.
t. Even worse; you're going to forward it to someone else.
a. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is because they
do not have a e-mail address.
b. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
c. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so
she can create a screen saver.
d. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if
anyone is home.
e. Every commercial on television has a web site address at the bottom of
the screen.
f. You buy a computer and 3 months later it is out of date and now
sells for half the price you paid.
g. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the
first 20 or 30 years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.
h. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase
would be a hassle and take planning.
i. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.
j. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.
k. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.
l. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.
m. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.
n. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.
o. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
p. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your
coffee.
q. You wake up at 2 AM to go to the bathroom and check your E- mail on your way back to bed.
r. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
s. You're reading this.
t. Even worse; you're going to forward it to someone else.
Weaksid
Reply #630 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:42 PM
Reply #630 Saturday, February 22, 2003 6:42 PM
And I think most of these apply to alot of peeps here
Kimbabe
Reply #631 Saturday, February 22, 2003 7:01 PM
Reply #631 Saturday, February 22, 2003 7:01 PM
WEAKSID! it applies to me!
I think Ph00ey and I have the same HMO!
Kimbabe looks a Ph00ey differently now that she's seen his softer side You tell funny jokes but oh! you write beautiful poetry!
I think Ph00ey and I have the same HMO!
Kimbabe looks a Ph00ey differently now that she's seen his softer side
You tell funny jokes but oh! you write beautiful poetry!
Mr_Ph00ey2u
Reply #632 Saturday, February 22, 2003 7:47 PM
Reply #632 Saturday, February 22, 2003 7:47 PM
I resemble that, Weaksid!
Kim, stop it...you're making me blush!
More Hospital Jokes!
Cheaper
Last time I was in the hospital, I really enjoyed myself:
Patting the bottoms of the pretty nurses, offering to show them my circumcision scar, and the like. One nurse finally had all she could stand of my crude behavior and said, "A pervert like you should be living in a house of prostitution!"
I grinned at her and said, "Well, it WOULD be cheaper than here, but I can't get my insurance to pay for it!"
Kim, stop it...you're making me blush!
More Hospital Jokes!
Cheaper
Last time I was in the hospital, I really enjoyed myself:
Patting the bottoms of the pretty nurses, offering to show them my circumcision scar, and the like. One nurse finally had all she could stand of my crude behavior and said, "A pervert like you should be living in a house of prostitution!"
I grinned at her and said, "Well, it WOULD be cheaper than here, but I can't get my insurance to pay for it!"
werewolf
Reply #633 Sunday, February 23, 2003 11:18 AM
Reply #633 Sunday, February 23, 2003 11:18 AM
Three women all worked in the same office with the same female boss.
Each day, they noticed the boss left work early. One day,the women
decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her.
After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know
they went home early.
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening,
spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa
before meeting a dinner date.
The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband, but
when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from inside.
Slowly and quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see
her husband in bed with her boss!
Gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.
The next day the brunette and redhead planned to leave early again, and
they asked the blonde if she was going to go with them. "No way," the
blonde exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"
Each day, they noticed the boss left work early. One day,the women
decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her.
After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know
they went home early.
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening,
spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa
before meeting a dinner date.
The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband, but
when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from inside.
Slowly and quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see
her husband in bed with her boss!
Gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.
The next day the brunette and redhead planned to leave early again, and
they asked the blonde if she was going to go with them. "No way," the
blonde exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"
Xaltec
Reply #636 Sunday, February 23, 2003 5:58 PM
Reply #636 Sunday, February 23, 2003 5:58 PM
A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 AM.
Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed. She sleepily sat up and said, "Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I've got a splitting headache."
"Certainly, honey," he said, and feeling his way across the room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store.
As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, "Say," said the druggist, "aren't you Officer Fenwick of the 8th District?"
"Yes, I am," said the officer.
"Well, then, what in the world are you doing in the Fire Chief's uniform?"
Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed. She sleepily sat up and said, "Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I've got a splitting headache."
"Certainly, honey," he said, and feeling his way across the room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store.
As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, "Say," said the druggist, "aren't you Officer Fenwick of the 8th District?"
"Yes, I am," said the officer.
"Well, then, what in the world are you doing in the Fire Chief's uniform?"
Xaltec
Reply #637 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:03 PM
Reply #637 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:03 PM
Two young medical students were standing on a street corner observing people as they passed and discussing any abnormalities with each other that they may have seen in passers-by. They would then attempt to make the correct diagnosis.
They spotted this old fellow leaving a bar sort of "duck waddling" down the street at a slow pace. The two students introduced themselves to the gentleman and told him that they didn't agree with each others diagnosis of the his problem.
One says, "my friend thinks you have a bad case of hemorrhoids, and I think you have a hernia." Which of us is correct?
The old man replies, "Well fellas, I thought it was a fart, but it looks like we were all wrong!"
They spotted this old fellow leaving a bar sort of "duck waddling" down the street at a slow pace. The two students introduced themselves to the gentleman and told him that they didn't agree with each others diagnosis of the his problem.
One says, "my friend thinks you have a bad case of hemorrhoids, and I think you have a hernia." Which of us is correct?
The old man replies, "Well fellas, I thought it was a fart, but it looks like we were all wrong!"
Xaltec
Reply #638 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:10 PM
Reply #638 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:10 PM
A guy takes his ill and aging wife in to the doctor's office.
After a full examination, the doc tells the guy it's one of two things.
The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimers disease or AIDS."
"What do you mean!" The guy says, "Can't you tell the difference?"
"Well," says the Doc, "the two look a lot alike in the early stages... Tell you what ya do...Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, - don't have sex with her anymore!"
After a full examination, the doc tells the guy it's one of two things.
The Doc says, "Well, it's either Alzheimers disease or AIDS."
"What do you mean!" The guy says, "Can't you tell the difference?"
"Well," says the Doc, "the two look a lot alike in the early stages... Tell you what ya do...Drive her way out into the country, kick her out of the car, and if she finds her way back, - don't have sex with her anymore!"
Xaltec
Reply #639 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:13 PM
Reply #639 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:13 PM
An elderly lady goes into the doctor and tells him - "Doctor, I don't know what the problem is, but I've been farting all the time. It's not really a problem socially because they don't make any noise and don't smell. I just can't stop farting all the time. In fact while I've been in here I must have farted at least 20 times."
The doctor nods and gives her some pills. "Here take these for two weeks and come see me again when you are done."
So she takes the pills and returns two weeks later as instructed. Infuriated, she confronted the doctor. "What kind of medicine is this? I'm still farting just as much? They still don't make any noise, but now they stink terribly!"
The doctor nodded, "It's alright, now that we have your sinus' cleared up, we'll work on your hearing next!"
The doctor nods and gives her some pills. "Here take these for two weeks and come see me again when you are done."
So she takes the pills and returns two weeks later as instructed. Infuriated, she confronted the doctor. "What kind of medicine is this? I'm still farting just as much? They still don't make any noise, but now they stink terribly!"
The doctor nodded, "It's alright, now that we have your sinus' cleared up, we'll work on your hearing next!"
Xaltec
Reply #640 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:16 PM
Reply #640 Sunday, February 23, 2003 6:16 PM
Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.
If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are Co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have Multiple Personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are Paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are Delusional, press 7, your call will be transfered to the Mothership.
If you are Schizophrenic, listen carefully, and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are Manic Depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.
If you are Dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a Nervous Disorder, please fidget with the Pound Button until a representative comes on the line.
If you have Amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.
If you have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.
If you have Bi-Polar Disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, please try to call again later.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.
If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are Co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have Multiple Personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are Paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are Delusional, press 7, your call will be transfered to the Mothership.
If you are Schizophrenic, listen carefully, and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are Manic Depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.
If you are Dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a Nervous Disorder, please fidget with the Pound Button until a representative comes on the line.
If you have Amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.
If you have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.
If you have Bi-Polar Disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, please try to call again later.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.
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Reply #621 Friday, February 21, 2003 11:43 AM