MYASS joke
Saturday, January 18, 2003 by Lord Vimal | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
here's a joke...
**********
MY ASS
This memo is to announce the development of a new software system which will be Year 2000 compliant. This program is known as "Millennia Year Application Software System" (MYASS).
"Next Monday there will be a meeting in which I will show MYASS to everyone. We will hold demonstrations throughout the month so that all employees will have an opportunity to get a good look at MYASS. We have not addressed networking aspects yet, so currently only one person at a time can use MYASS. This restriction will be removed after MYASS expands. Some employees have begun using the program already. This morning I walked into a subordinate's office and was not surprised to find that he had his nose buried in MYASS. Some of the less technical people may be somewhat afraid of MYASS. Last week my secretary said to me, "I'm a little nervous, I never put anything in MYASS before." I helped her through the first time and afterward she admitted that it was relatively painless and she was actually looking forward to doing it again, and was even ready to kiss MYASS. There have been concerns over the virus that was found in MYASS upon initial installation, but the virus has been eliminated and we were able to save MYASS. In the future, however, protection will be required prior to entering MYASS. This database will encompass all information associated with the business. As you begin using the program, feel free to put anything you want in MYASS. As MYASS grows larger, we envision a time when it will be commonplace for a supervisor to hand work to an employee and say, "here, stick this in MYASS."
It will be a great day when we need data quickly and our employees can respond, "Here it is, I just pulled it out of MYASS."
**********
MY ASS
This memo is to announce the development of a new software system which will be Year 2000 compliant. This program is known as "Millennia Year Application Software System" (MYASS).
"Next Monday there will be a meeting in which I will show MYASS to everyone. We will hold demonstrations throughout the month so that all employees will have an opportunity to get a good look at MYASS. We have not addressed networking aspects yet, so currently only one person at a time can use MYASS. This restriction will be removed after MYASS expands. Some employees have begun using the program already. This morning I walked into a subordinate's office and was not surprised to find that he had his nose buried in MYASS. Some of the less technical people may be somewhat afraid of MYASS. Last week my secretary said to me, "I'm a little nervous, I never put anything in MYASS before." I helped her through the first time and afterward she admitted that it was relatively painless and she was actually looking forward to doing it again, and was even ready to kiss MYASS. There have been concerns over the virus that was found in MYASS upon initial installation, but the virus has been eliminated and we were able to save MYASS. In the future, however, protection will be required prior to entering MYASS. This database will encompass all information associated with the business. As you begin using the program, feel free to put anything you want in MYASS. As MYASS grows larger, we envision a time when it will be commonplace for a supervisor to hand work to an employee and say, "here, stick this in MYASS."
It will be a great day when we need data quickly and our employees can respond, "Here it is, I just pulled it out of MYASS."
Koasati
Reply #3 Saturday, January 18, 2003 11:50 PM
Reply #3 Saturday, January 18, 2003 11:50 PM
I wonder if they need someone in UI design............. I like to be able to say, "I'm the guy, that skinned MYASS!" 
Lord Vimal
Reply #4 Sunday, January 19, 2003 10:56 PM
Reply #4 Sunday, January 19, 2003 10:56 PM
the most popular skinning prog in the internet: Windowblinds, wont WORK with MYASS. maybe our dear friend KOASATI will be able to skin MYASS. but MYASS uses a completely different technique to avoid skinners skinning MYASS!
Peff
Reply #6 Sunday, January 19, 2003 11:02 PM
Reply #6 Sunday, January 19, 2003 11:02 PM
Jafo.....What ever happenned to Aafus???? Did someone finally kill the 'bot?
Angel_Wings
Reply #7 Sunday, January 19, 2003 11:03 PM
Reply #7 Sunday, January 19, 2003 11:03 PM
Bot, Peff?
You accusing him of being an A.L.I.C.E?
You accusing him of being an A.L.I.C.E?
Angel_Wings
Reply #9 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:00 PM
Reply #9 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:00 PM
Hey, the only ASS around here is me! 
ASS= A Sexy Seductress hehe
ASS= A Sexy Seductress hehe
kthxbye
Reply #10 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:01 PM
Reply #10 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:01 PM
*blinks*
Wait - so what about when my roomie calls me an ass all the time!?
Or is there a differentiation between ASS and ass?
Wait - so what about when my roomie calls me an ass all the time!?
Or is there a differentiation between ASS and ass?
Angel_Wings
Reply #12 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:04 PM
Reply #12 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 9:04 PM
Ass/ass is well...always gonna be an ass
...but ASS is an acronym in my sense of the word...hehe
...but ASS is an acronym in my sense of the word...hehe
kthxbye
Reply #13 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 10:58 PM
Reply #13 Wednesday, January 22, 2003 10:58 PM
Darn! Here I was, hoping I was an official seductress! Even if, well, that would just be a tad strange...
I can still dream!
I can still dream!
mrbiotech
Reply #14 Thursday, January 23, 2003 2:38 AM
Reply #14 Thursday, January 23, 2003 2:38 AM
I guess we'll pass the beta version; Looks like it's got bugs in it.
lxp
Reply #15 Thursday, January 23, 2003 4:55 AM
Reply #15 Thursday, January 23, 2003 4:55 AM
Hi guys,
I saw the title of this thread and just had to add this:
Here in Australia there's a small town called Yass. In this small town there's a McDonald's.
There's a big sign out front of this McDonald's with the golden arches and then YASS in big lettering. The text 'Open 6AM' is conveniently located.
So you can guess how this sign is read... and if you can't then you really aren't any fun, are you?
Cheers,
LxP
I saw the title of this thread and just had to add this:
Here in Australia there's a small town called Yass. In this small town there's a McDonald's.
There's a big sign out front of this McDonald's with the golden arches and then YASS in big lettering. The text 'Open 6AM' is conveniently located.
So you can guess how this sign is read... and if you can't then you really aren't any fun, are you?
Cheers,
LxP
Weaksid
Reply #16 Thursday, January 23, 2003 5:03 AM
Reply #16 Thursday, January 23, 2003 5:03 AM
MYASS needs a upgrade.. The new design of MYASS will be slick and smooth.
kthxbye
Reply #17 Thursday, January 23, 2003 12:06 PM
Reply #17 Thursday, January 23, 2003 12:06 PM
Ixp - we /totally/ need pictures of this! Go, shoo! Get 'em!
Okay, well, maybe not /we/ - but /I/ need pictures of this!
Okay, well, maybe not /we/ - but /I/ need pictures of this!
Adam White
Reply #18 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:48 PM
Reply #18 Friday, January 24, 2003 6:48 PM
i am shaping my ASS at the gym. at 45- i need alot of work on it.
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Reply #1 Saturday, January 18, 2003 5:07 PM