Aborigine and a koala in the outback having a crap.

Aborigine says to the koala "Hey mate, does it stick to your fur?"

"Sure does" replies the koala.

So the Aborigine picks up the koala by the scruff of the neck and wipes himself...

Whew! Talk about 'barking' up the wrong tree...  Now that could hurt!

Just discovered something really amazing:

Australia's $5, $10, $20, $50 and $100 notes are plastic. This makes them difficult to counterfeit and more durable than paper money.

Here in the States...a little known fact: Our "paper" money isn't paper at all...it's cloth! No wonder it's "laundered".

Fuzzy is just plain sick.

When asked about spotted owls:

A man is defending himself at trial after having been caught by a game warden just as he blew a Spotted Owl into a flurry of feathers.

After reading the charges, the judge, well known for his environmental sympathies, gravely announced that since the species concerned is in danger of imminent extinction, he would have to make an example out of the defendant.

The man, waxing eloquent, said he was very sorry for what he'd done, but that he was totally destitute and needed the bird to need his hungry children. All he had to his name, he said, his coice cracking with emotion, was the little bit of bird shot he had left in his gun.

The judge took off his glasses to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye, and after regaining his composure, told the defendant he would let him go with a warning this time.

The man beamed with pride as he started out of the courtroom.

Just then, the judge called out, "Oh, by the way, what does a Spotted Owl taste like?"

The man's face came alive as he turned around and said, "Your honor, it's hard to describe. Sort of a cross between a Bald Eagle, a Whopping Crane and a California Condor."

There's one set of traffic lights.....in a part of the country that's SOOOOOOO busy that the next nearest set of traffic lights is....

....700 km away.

Most cars on the planet couldn't even manage to drive from one to the other...not without a refill....

A few weeks ago I was looking for something [as you do] and came upon a site documenting all sorts of crap that Aussies had invented.  The one I giggled about the most was....

1995 - Jindalee Radar System - The United States of America spent $11 billion developing an aeroplane that could not be detected by radar. Scientists at the CSIRO then concluded that if the plane could not be detected, perhaps the turbulance it makes passing through air could be. $1.5 million later, the Jindalee Radar system had transformed the stealth bomber into nothing more than an unusual looking aircraft.

Kinda sum us bastards up, really....

Little Known Facts: How Australia got its name.

When Captain Cook claimed possession of what is now Eastern Australia in 1770, he named it New South Wales. It wasn't until fourteen years later that the continent acquired its present name.

This came about in February 1785 when Josiah A Kerr, the coxwain of a penal colony supply ship, landed on the wooded shore of Desolation Bay with a watering party and mistook a bandicoot track for a bridleway.

Kerr set off alone to explore it, and was never seen again. His parting words, "There's an 'orse trail 'ere", passed into folklore and became corrupted into Orstralia, subsequently latinised as Australia.

I know that sounds a shade outlandish...and really hard to believe, but here's the reference:

The story is first recorded in the journal of Midshipman Roger D' Bycrewe (unpublished, British Library; IBS 3.141592653589). It is referred to (disparagingly) in Willy Knott's 'Continents for the Traveller' (Vol II), and also in 'Ned Kelly to Edna Everage; The Mythology of a Nation' by Sydney Bridge (Fable and Fable, 1968).

Couldn't be true, could it? Sounds a bit like TT in the sky to me.

What do people fear most? At the top of the list is death, the fear of which is necrophobia. Second, apparently, is the fear of failure, which is called kakorrhaphiophobia. There is of course a story of how fears developed, like fear for the number 13. The fear of Friday the 13th is called paraskavedekatriaphobia.

and did you know

In October 1943, a pigeon called White Vision led a search and rescue team to the wreck of a downed flying boat after the search had been called off. White Vision had flown over 60 miles against a 25 mph head wind in heavy weather. The crew was rescued, for which White Vision received the Dickin Medal.

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of their unwanted people without killing them used to burn their houses down - hence the expression "to get fired." 

A snail can sleep for 3 years.

What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common?-- All were invented by women.

40% of all people who come to a party in your home snoop in your medicine cabinet.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Coca-Cola was originally green.

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs.

Good stuff Doc

Definitely an original idea for the OP, Shaunna...you're pretty talented at finding interesting matters that aren't confrontational nor negative.

I say Shaunna for Creative Editor!

Hey did you know, that the aliens have landed here at  Goodna Queensland Australia

Aww thanks Doc, you are so sweet, a real confidence boost

#31 looks like something out of Dr Who...

...which to segue neatly into this thread...

The first Australian in space was - Tegan Jovanka

Hmmm....Oi! Aliens! Why does the one on the left look a tad Pommie, eh?

I wouldn't mind meeting aliens as long as their ship isn't fueled by curried cabbage for interstellar travel.  Perhaps that's how the gas giant planets were formed!

I don't know what it's called, either, but I sure as hell feel for you, Ed. It must be a terrible thing to have to live with and I sincerely hope it never ever comes to that for you.

Not to make light of your situation...

Did you know that Shaunna had the same fear?  Guess that's why she banned 'dutch ovens' from the bedtime agenda.

I don't think you'd have any worries there... aliens came to the same conclusion as Shaunna, so nipped it in the bud at the source, by banning curried cabbage entirely. 

Wonder if that's why UFO's have stopped visiting our neck of the woods???

Always thought she was cute....

Hmmmm it could be related in some way