You know you are addicted to technology when...
Thursday, December 4, 2008 by ALMonty | Discussion: Community
You know you are addicted to technology when...
You can't sit through an entire movie without having at least one device on your body beep or buzz.
You think of the gadgets in your office as "friends", but you forget to send your father a birthday card.
In computer shops, you eavesdrop on a salesman talking with customers, butt in to correct him and spend 20 minutes answering the customers' questions, while the salesman stands by silently, nodding his head.
You say "digital compression" in a conversation without thinking how strange your mouth feels saying it.
You constantly find yourself in groups of people to whom you say "digital compression". Everyone understands what you mean and you are not surprised or disappointed that you don't have to explain it.
You say "voice number" instead of "phone number" as the majority of phone lines in any house are linked to contraptions that talk to other contraptions.
You back up your data every day.
On holiday, you read a computer manual and turn the pages faster than those who read John Grisham novels.
You go to trade shows and map out your path of the exhibit hall in advance. But you can't give someone directions to your house without looking up street names.
You would rather get more dots per inch than miles per gallon.
You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.
You understand all these jokes.
If so, technology has taken over your life. We suggest you go lie under a tree and write a haiku. And don't use a laptop.
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Reply #102 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 5:33 AM
Everyone knows they're only for melting cheese, starkers! 
Reply #103 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 9:57 AM
He doesn't need cheese Doc. Cheese causes constipation, and a blockage in Starkers could have disasterous results. Unless we use a little techology and attach a hose hookup to his naval and start filling cars with crude methane. At least Goodna's fuel problems will be solved.
Reply #104 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 10:10 AM
Guess i qualify for addicted to technology,hands down an addict
Reply #105 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 10:12 AM
Ah, now I understand why mrs starkers calls cheese 'blockhole' 
Reply #106 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 4:30 PM
That's true starkers, I heard it binds your stomach..or..something.. meh, I'm not giving up my swiss cheese, and I'm NOT quitting on cooking it to perfection in my DVD player.. after all, that's what it's for.. right? 
Reply #107 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 5:44 PM
No, you use the Blu-ray player for cheese and the standard player for pizza. Because cheese is made of more 'stuff', you'll need a more powerful player which can read all of the 'stuff'. Even if a standard player could cook cheese, it would become contaminated with the melted cheese and it wouldn't work.
Reply #108 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 6:09 PM
I'm never getting Blueray, I'm sick of all the damn upgrades, 1 DVD player should be able to cook ALL kinds of toast! 
Reply #109 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 6:12 PM
Toast?? Toast had nothing to do with it! But go ahead, I just love to see people fail miserably.
p.s. the updates for Blu-ray should render the older player obselete with time, so... up your USB port! (joking, man)
Reply #110 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 6:45 PM
You shouldn't have any constipatrion worries with Swiss cheese... the holes help reduce the binding effect, tho the air in the holes could pose a gas problem if you eat too many of 'em.
Reply #111 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 7:28 PM
Toast has EVERYTHING to do with it, what do you use your player for?
Movies?
You shouldn't have any constipatrion worries with Swiss cheese... the holes help reduce the binding effect, tho the air in the holes could pose a gas problem if you eat too many of 'em.
Again with the gas 
Reply #113 Thursday, December 25, 2008 6:50 AM
You know you're addicted to technology when you 1 y/o grandson punches you in the nuts after trying for several hours to wrestle from you a remole controlled car HE got for Xmas.
Reply #115 Thursday, December 25, 2008 10:12 AM
You know you're addicted to technology when you wake up with a hangover, but then find yourself surrounded by stripped motherboards.
You may also be addicted to technology when you start seeing '0100010100111000101001100' repeat itself in your vision, probably brought on by all that iPod downloading.
Reply #116 Thursday, December 25, 2008 10:41 AM
You're addicted to tech when you try to take the kid to Disneyworld and THIS happens:
Reply #117 Thursday, December 25, 2008 5:31 PM
You know you're addicted to technology when you've managed to discover Impulse!! Or find that image...
Reply #119 Thursday, December 25, 2008 9:13 PM
You know you're addicted to technology when the airport scanner goes off and they find a Sony Playstation; a laptop; an Xbox; a DVD player; a 12' LCD TV, remotes, half a dozen gamesand hand controls in your suitcase... but no clothes.
You also know when technology has gone too far when you're you're in Tandy and see an electronic condom roller on'er.
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Reply #101 Wednesday, December 24, 2008 4:41 AM
Not really... but it came out rewound ready for the next time.
I tried doing cheese on toast in the popup toaster once... which I thought was a peculiar name and false advertising. Blasted thing never popped up at all, so I took it back and demanded a refund.