I am Strange BedFellow of Borg......Was that you Slumber Beds Demonstrator of Borg I heard hollerin' cause his knickers got caught on his implant chasin' Miss Periwinkle of Borg around the demo model?

Nah, that was my colleague, Mr Boneypart.

I am Store Detective of Borg.... yeah, I got Mr Boneypart on security cam flashing his boney part at Mrs Periwinkle, and her giggling like a schoolgirl who's seen a winky for the very first time.

I am Ron Jeremy of Borg.... I may very well be interested in that bit of footage now that I've gone into producing, rather than starring in pron.

I am Bounty Hunter of Borg....Ron Jeremy of Borg...time's up. Your pron days are done!

I am Mrs Perriwinkle of Borg....Ron Jeremy of Borg....you'd better not lose that new implant you suckered me into buying for you. The warranty is only good for one round, maybe two.

I am Lisa Ann of Borg.... Hey there Ron Jeremy of Borg, d'yer wanna do the remake of Nailin' Palin with me?

I am Tina Fey of Borg.... people say my SNL portrayal of Sarah Palin was more Palin-like than Sarah Palin herself, and I was just goofing off.

I am Sarah Palin of Borg... hey Lisa Ann, could you teach me to get nailed like that?

I am Nail Biter of Borg....I'm really on the edge of my seat over this one.

Tina Fey of Borg....continue goofing off. The GOP just might throw Sarah Palin of Borg in the junk heap.

Lisa Ann of Borg....Ron Jeremy's implant just self destructed. Told him to renew but does he listen...nooo.

I am Recycler of Borg... I'll have to steer clear of that when I'm foraging at the garbage tip, then, we don't need her being recycled as spare parts, do we!!!

I am President Of Pfizer of Borg... I tried to get Ron onto Viagra to fix that, but he insisted the starch was good enough and now brewers droop has forced him into early retirement.

I am Sarah Palin of Borg.... if Mr. Jeremy had come to Alaska, as governor I probably could have provided a 'supplementary benefit' to keep his implant gainfully employed.

I am Internal Investigator the Fourteenth of Fifteenth of Borg....Sarah Palin of Borg has overstepped herself. She broke the only working Viagra simulator. Please refer this to Infernal Affairs Division Chief HarkonnedoraBundi Alwhichinatbutt of Borg. She'll know what to do.

I am Desperate of Borg.... once upon a time I thought Sarah Palin was hot as.... then she opened her mouth.

I am Irma Nici of Borg... I always wondered why people said 'bend it like Beckham, then I saw his IMPLANT.

I am Posh Spice of Borg.... Aw c'mon, it might have a little kink in it but it's not that bent.

I am Scary Spice... I wouldn't know, didn't spend a lot of time looking at it.

I am Floozy Exterminator of Borg....Irma Nicci...we got your number.

I am David Beckham of Borg....I repeat, I did not floozy with that woman.

I am UPS person of Borg....There's no answer at either Ron Jeremy's cubicle or at Irma Nicci's. Methinks they be cahootin' together.

I am Victoria Beckham of Borg.... I know David didn't hide the implant with that Irma hooker person because he's a bit... er, a lot premature these days.  He always dribbles before he shoots.

I am Soccer Coach of Borg.... I'm sorry it got to that, Vic, I got him practicing dribbling so much during training that it has become habitual... even in bed.

I am Ole Limerick of Borg....if you dribble before you diddle be a sweet and change the sheet.

I'll pay that one   K.

I am Ole Limerick of Borg... there was a young man from Bel-Air, who did his girl on the stair, on the 99th stroke, the banister broke, so he finished her off in mid air.

I am Trapeze Artist of Bel-Air of Borg.... so promptly to the doctor I went, because my implant became terribly bent, the doc said to save me the trouble, I should put it in double, and instead of coming I went.

......pause...... ......pause to catch breath.....

I am Ole Limerick of Borg...There was an old man who did it in his room, but he had to pause, because, the turd fell off the end of his broom.

I am The Grim Reaper of Borg.... no, that ripping Mr. Grim is not a relative of mine, so please, feel free to RIP him a new one.

I am The Adonis of Borg....I am The All Powerful......has anyone seen my pantyhose? I know I left it here somewhere.

I am George Michaels of Borg... check under my bed cos I think your pantyhose got kicked under there during foreplay. 

I am Tiger Woods of Borg.... GEORGE!!!!   Have you been two-timing me again??

I am Elin Woods of Borg... Ah, so that's why your implant was a deeper brown than usual.

OH NO! FudgePqcker of Borg is back. Hide all the lollipops.

I am Tasty Kake of Borg......I quit...see ya...bye.

I am Entemens of Borg......Hey Tasty Kake...wait for me!!

I am Blank Blankety Blank of Borg......Blank, blank...blank blank blank. So there...blank!

I am Blankety Blank of Borg.... hey George, have you been blanking in public toilets again?

I am George Michaels of Borg.... no, I was blanking behind the wheel and crashed my car into a corner store.

I am Corner Store Owner of Borg......I wuz in da middle of blankin' when you blanked behind your wheel. Next time blank in front so's ya kin' see what you're blankin' doin' ya blankety blank blank.

I am The Blankety Oversight Officer of Borg......please watch your use of the blankety blanks. Bandwidth is very expensive since it got de-regulated.