Rumor "Cygya Software releases Area51 Vapour Suite"
From: Is this for Real Dept
Sunday, January 16, 2005 by CygnusXII | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
"Yes, folks! It's that time of year again. The BIG Cygya Expo, here at Area51!"
"The rumour this year, is the Area51 Vapour Suite. Finally some light on the subject. It has been rumoured, that the Area51 Vapour Suite is nearing completion. I want to confirm that this wicked rumour, is actually just a rumour, and that there is no shred of evidence that the Area51 Vapour Suite is near completion. However the much anticipated Jabberwocky Multifaceted holistic interface Improver, is nearing completion." Now I know you are sitting there wetting your undies, in anticipation, the panoptic features of Area51 Vapour Suite. It's amazing features include such items, as integrated, word processing, cheese grater and tummy scratcher, html editor, lumber stretcher and doubles as a left handed monkey wrentch (in a pinch.)
"But why STOP there, you ask?"
Well we here at Cygya Software couldn't leave our loyal Customers in the lurch! As an added incentive, for waiting patiently, while the Area51 Suite is completed, we have decided to throw in a wonderfull, set of Ginsuey Knives on purchase (once the Suite is actually completed.)Also we have worked a deal with Ron Popeele, to include his patented Spray Paint Hair in a can as an added bonus.
This was written as a satire of someones' prior promotional efforts, no actual products exist and if it actually does, then GOD Help us all.
"The rumour this year, is the Area51 Vapour Suite. Finally some light on the subject. It has been rumoured, that the Area51 Vapour Suite is nearing completion. I want to confirm that this wicked rumour, is actually just a rumour, and that there is no shred of evidence that the Area51 Vapour Suite is near completion. However the much anticipated Jabberwocky Multifaceted holistic interface Improver, is nearing completion." Now I know you are sitting there wetting your undies, in anticipation, the panoptic features of Area51 Vapour Suite. It's amazing features include such items, as integrated, word processing, cheese grater and tummy scratcher, html editor, lumber stretcher and doubles as a left handed monkey wrentch (in a pinch.)
"But why STOP there, you ask?"
Well we here at Cygya Software couldn't leave our loyal Customers in the lurch! As an added incentive, for waiting patiently, while the Area51 Suite is completed, we have decided to throw in a wonderfull, set of Ginsuey Knives on purchase (once the Suite is actually completed.)Also we have worked a deal with Ron Popeele, to include his patented Spray Paint Hair in a can as an added bonus.
This was written as a satire of someones' prior promotional efforts, no actual products exist and if it actually does, then GOD Help us all.
MikeB314
Reply #4 Sunday, January 16, 2005 7:38 PM
Reply #4 Sunday, January 16, 2005 7:38 PM
That free knife set might come in handy if I have to read many more of those "announcements". 
CygnusXII
Reply #6 Sunday, January 16, 2005 9:11 PM
Reply #6 Sunday, January 16, 2005 9:11 PM
Well as you know (because I am telling you now) there are hints that a competitor of Cygya Software, is about to have an Expo of their own, and offer some of their own products and demonstrations, of other products also.
We here at Cygya are planning on "Actual" product Demos' of real time applications, such as Windows Notepad Friend or Foe, MS Paint for beginners, and not to be forgotten Windows Recycler for the Complete Idiot, as well as those wonderfull classics as "I'm OK, you're on a Mac!" and who could forget "Top 10 Uses for Clippy, and Adventure in MSWord
Now I know our competition is stiff, so I think we are going to have to bring out the BIG GUNS and also reveal that we will have a special Guest appearence Host for some of our Presentations. Thats right... None other than Hervé Villechaize that lovable rascal from Fantasy Island, and his sidekick MR. Bubbles
So bring a sack lunch, when we release the Expo dates, and enjoy the shows.
[EDITED]
Any similarities between this and a real Product Promotion is purely coincidence. If anyone believes this is a real advertisement, then they should have their head examined.
We here at Cygya are planning on "Actual" product Demos' of real time applications, such as Windows Notepad Friend or Foe, MS Paint for beginners, and not to be forgotten Windows Recycler for the Complete Idiot, as well as those wonderfull classics as "I'm OK, you're on a Mac!" and who could forget "Top 10 Uses for Clippy, and Adventure in MSWord
Now I know our competition is stiff, so I think we are going to have to bring out the BIG GUNS and also reveal that we will have a special Guest appearence Host for some of our Presentations. Thats right... None other than Hervé Villechaize that lovable rascal from Fantasy Island, and his sidekick MR. Bubbles
So bring a sack lunch, when we release the Expo dates, and enjoy the shows.
[EDITED]
Any similarities between this and a real Product Promotion is purely coincidence. If anyone believes this is a real advertisement, then they should have their head examined.
craeonics
Reply #8 Monday, January 17, 2005 11:01 AM
Reply #8 Monday, January 17, 2005 11:01 AM
craeonics thinks he's going to preemptively ip-ban people just in case it is serious
CygnusXII
Reply #9 Monday, January 17, 2005 11:33 AM
Reply #9 Monday, January 17, 2005 11:33 AM
Well considering that Tattoo is Dead, I kinda think I'm being a little "tongue in cheek" here. 
Old_Crab
Reply #10 Monday, January 17, 2005 3:38 PM
Reply #10 Monday, January 17, 2005 3:38 PM
This deal sounds so ..... good. Really. An excellent marketing ploy. But you have not fooled me! I'll take 7 net-worked editions! The knives you can keep. However the hair in a can is a just too good to be true.....I've never turned down such a remarkable deal! Please send to me as soon as possible! I've already sent you a blank check to fill in the amount of purchase for me, so please don't delay my order! 
Essencay
Reply #11 Monday, January 17, 2005 3:44 PM
...you might consider hanging a few pine-scented auto airfreshners around his neck
Reply #11 Monday, January 17, 2005 3:44 PM
| Well considering that Tattoo is Dead, |
...you might consider hanging a few pine-scented auto airfreshners around his neck
Please login to comment and/or vote for this skin.
Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:
- Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums and downloading skins.
- Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
- Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
- It's simple, and FREE!
Reply #1 Sunday, January 16, 2005 6:00 PM
Now, did you make sure you have posted this rumour at least five times?