The Ultimate Solution!
Tuesday, July 29, 2003 by grayhaze | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Stage 1 - Ratings
First, we remove the ratings system. We then have a level playing field where no one piece of work is seen to be better than another. Three month's worth of skinning can stand side-by-side with little 3 year old Timmy's MS Paint drawing of Puddles the cat.
Stage 2 - Download Counts
Second, we remove the public visibility of download counts. This removes any form of competition on the site, and prevents only those works which have already been downloaded 100,000 times from being looked at by Joe Public. In turn this would mean the removal of the 'Top Downloads' and 'Top Artists' counts. Let everyone sift through the endless pages of random crap to find the gems. Everyone should be made to work for their treats.
Stage 3 - Creation/Update Dates
Third, remove the display of the creation and update dates. Who cares if those two year old skins only support a tiny selection of current features? Everything is equal, so let's just mix everything up into a random multitude of pages full of random skins. Of course, this would remove the 'New Additions' display too, but I'm sure it won't be too difficult to find the new stuff.
Stage 4 - Author Names
Fourth, it's time to remove those author names. It should just be part of the fun to guess who made a skin. We don't want someone's reputation to influence Joe Public into downloading their latest. Of course, there wouldn't be much point in having author profiles anymore. Who cares about the people, when it should all be about the skins?
Stage 5 - Comments
Fifth, remove the ability to comment on a skin. Does it really matter what these people think anyway? It stops them from being mean, which just harms a skin's chance of getting on to the Top Downloads. Oh, wait... we already got rid of those anyway...
Stage 6 - Screen Shots
Sixth, we remove the ability to upload a screenshot of a skin. This prevents people from showing someone else's wallpaper and icons without having their permission, and adds yet another fun random element to the download process. It also saves on bandwidth.
Stage 7 - Names
Seventh, we remove the ability to name a skin. From now on, all skins will be given a number. Random of course, to prevent any idea of creation sequence. This will also prevent the use of someone else's name which they were saving up to use for their next skin.
Stage 8 - Sorting
Eighth, we remove the sorting and dividing of skins into pages. It takes too long to go through page after page of skins, and you always end up with those skins which are unfairly placed right on the last page. Just put them all on one page. That's what scrollbars were invented for.
Stage 9 - Site Sections
Ninth, remove all of the sections and merge them into one. This will prevent any ideas of favouritism toward particular types of works. Of course, we won't display any indicator of what an individual work is either. That would just be asking for trouble.
Stage 10 - Message Board
Tenth, remove the message board entirely. There's bound to be someone who disagrees with the way this plan has been going, and we don't want to hear them complaining anymore.
There now... that should fix it. I'm sure you'll all agree, and we can get started on the changes immediately. If anyone has any complaints or suggestions, please don't leave them. We'll be turning off the message board in a couple of minutes anyway, so you'll only be wasting your breath.
[Message Edited]
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Reply #3 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 2:12 PM
!"We'll be turning off the message board in a couple of minutes anyway, so you'll only be wasting your breath.:
This should be a sticky thread!
"Puddles the cat"
Oh man we're rolling!
Reply #5 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 2:14 PM
Nicely done.
Reply #6 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 2:25 PM
Reply #7 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 2:28 PM
Reply #8 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 2:44 PM
This sounds perfect. Though instead of skins having just numbers instead of names, what about a randomly generated alpha numeric name? I.e. instead of my calling my skin "Athenda" it would be assigned to me as "9H52kD4".
And I also suggest adding a standard form letter for those unhappy.
I am leaving the site and pulling all my submissions because:
[ ] I don't feel it's fair for people to rate things. Artists should be considered above criticism from the masses.
[ ] This site is too commercial because: (please check all that apply)
( ) It doesn't have unlimited downloads for everyone requiring people to contribute something at a certain point.
( ) It is owned by a corporation that sells stuff.
( ) The most popular sections seem to be the ones made by the company that owns the site.
[ ] Wallpapers should not be moderated and I take moderation as a personal insult.
[ ] Wallpapers are not moderated enough and my god-like work is getting mixed up with the crud made by commoners.
[ ] I posted a highly inflammatory topic onto the message board that questioned the integrity or competence of the volunteers who run the site, promoted another site over this one, contained profanity, or contained a great deal of ignorance on the topic I was discussing and people flamed me for it.
I also expect that even so I am doing these things that whatever elite access I have attained will not be affected. I should have elite access that enables me to rate skins, themes, and wallpapers while having taken my submissions off the site and hence am not subject to being rated any longer.
This way, we can keep flame wars to a minimum.
Reply #9 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 3:14 PM
Reply #10 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 3:28 PM
Reply #12 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 3:54 PM
And his plan for site improvements also is simply amazing! Yes, I can see there's something in it to both appease and PO everyone simultaneously! Sheer genius!!
(Although it's true I might just prefer Young Timmy's Puddles the Cat to some other things I've seen. Of course there's no accounting for taste or my lack of it.
) (Gee, IR Brainiac, maybe we could get you a drool cup for Christmas? Or have you already taken to Saran wrapping your keyboards.
)
Reply #13 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 4:23 PM
Reply #14 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 4:33 PM
You're a cool dude grayhaze, or should I say ????????? as we no longer have names
Reply #15 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 7:52 PM
What a wonderfull idea Grayhaze! But you forgot the final stage:
Stage 11 - The skins
Lets remove the skins, themes, wallpapers and icons altogether, they are after all the primary cause of all the problems.
There, now we convered it all. Everybody should then be happy with a nice empty web page.
Reply #18 Wednesday, July 30, 2003 2:03 AM
Reply #20 Wednesday, July 30, 2003 4:25 AM
grayhaze, you are one seriously cracked dude....and I like it! This thread is one of the funniest I have read in a long time! (Too much of it hits too close to home, though )
But, you do have a point- if you remove author name, skin name, and all the other stuff- there will be no more "hey! that button was ripped from my skin!" type complaints, either! (Which is another topic that we have lost people over). Your plan is sheer genius!
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Reply #1 Tuesday, July 29, 2003 1:59 PM