Why So Serious?
Anyone heard any good jokes lately?
Wednesday, September 24, 2008 by Mirsguy | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
I thought it'd be cool, and funny, to see what jokes anyone has to offer.
Please, let's keep it good, decent, moral and clean. I would appreciate it if the off-color stuff would remain out of here!
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Reply #22 Friday, September 26, 2008 3:31 AM
--Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina
Dear Sir/Madam,
Please forward the application form to reinstate my food stamps to Plot 144 A sub-section B of the Greenville Cemetary... oh, and please send an application form for heating allowance, it gets mighty cold here of a night time and I get chilled to the bone.
Reply #23 Friday, September 26, 2008 3:36 AM
Answer: 'I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,'
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
"Besides, Social Services would cut off my food stamps... and I hate it when I'm hungry. 
Reply #24 Friday, September 26, 2008 8:44 AM
-- Dan Quayle
Ah, Huntington, Indiana's own Dan Quayle. Theres a nice little museum to him just down from my house. I've never been...
Reply #25 Friday, September 26, 2008 10:29 AM
--Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
Well obviously he wasn't that odd looking basketball player Dr Victor Frankentein hurriedly made in the hope of winning the comp.
Reply #26 Friday, September 26, 2008 10:59 AM
The patient can then take it to his or her doctor, who will examine it to determine whether or not it was a cardiac arrest or a bad case of angina... why even a severe case of indigestion can cause very similar symptoms, so please, if you think you've woken up dead, take your monitor results to your doctor immediately."
--Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
And this one really gets me....
'Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,'
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign .
She's too vague and doesn't explain which important part. That's the trouble these days, when celebrities champion a cause but skin over the details because they're celebrityness, hair and makeup. I mean, I wanna know what damned important part it is, Brooke.....
Reply #27 Friday, September 26, 2008 11:34 AM
I lost it after reading ". . HOLY MOTHER OF GOD . . .
WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION . . . WHAT THE HECK!!"
It kept getting funnier and funnier.
I wasn't warned NOT to read at work 
I had the laugh of my life 
@Lantec 
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Reply #21 Friday, September 26, 2008 3:24 AM
Really? You learn something new every day... I thought they ALL did, but who am I to argue with an authority on the subject.