I am Husband of Borg...you got to catch me first.

I am Man of Borg...OWWWWWWWWWW...that hurts...jeez.

I am Man of Borg...I just bought you a pair of......OWWWWWWWW...and again.

I am Wife of Borg...Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

I am Marriage Counselor of Borg... if you girls are having assimilation issues, I can show you how it's done, standard fees are then waived.

I am a solicitor of Borg - assimilation will cost you 200 an hour + expenses

I am Tax Assessor of Borg...It is my sincere hope you have documented proof of said charges Solicitor of Borg. Taxes assessed at 98.345623% per hour and an additional 68.346543% for expenses will be levied. Unless of course......(leans down close to whisper in Solicitor of Borg's implant) pssst. pssst, pssst.

I am Solicitor of Borg...pssst, pssst, pssst.

I am High Priced Hooker of Borg.... well you're always gonna be broke, then! My standard assimilation fees are 500 an hour + expenses.... more for that kinky stuff you love so much.

I am Bill Clinton of Borg... I sure hope that 500 an hour includes discretion, or does that come under 'expenses'?

I am Master Bates of Borg... well you won't be getting any of my money, then. If I go to bed with an 'implant problem' I wake up with solution in hand.

I am reality of Borg... work hard...

YYYAAAHHHHHH

I am Disgruntled Viewer of Borg... the reality is that there's too many effing reality/lifestyle shows pretending to be 'real life'

I am TV Producer of Borg... sorry, Disgruntled Viewer of Borg, but that's what people want.

I am Sarcastic Critic of Borg... hey, TV Producer of Borg, get yer hand off it and show us some 'real' entertainment, you wacker.

I am Guy Fawkes of Borg... do you want be to blow those TV producer bastards up.

I am Disgruntled Viewer of Borg... for all that's actually worth watching on TV, that's not such a bad idea... and while yer at it, put some gunpowder underneath those info-mercial bastards as well.

I was only kiddding of BorG..... and the sun will come out tomorow

I am Harbringer of Borg - 3 hours after the sun comes out, it will go super nova.  Might as well be assimilated now.

I am Mrs. Harbinger of Borg... you'll get assimilated if and when I say, in the meantime, take out the gargage, mow the lawn and weed the garden beds.

I am Sad sack of Borg... my wife is like yours, Harbinger, assimilations are far and few between. Before we were married I used to put a dollar in a tin beside the bed, and after, I took out a dollar evey time we assimilatde... boo-hoo, after 10 years of marriage there's still $90 in the tin.

Is that all there is of Borg....Might as well assimilate indeed

I am Borg of Things Past...assimilations used to be glorious undertakings. Now with this new generation all Borg does is...talk talk talk talk. Not even Picard aka Lucretious of borg talked that much. Better to have a cretin on the hooter to rally the youngsters.

I am Nothing of Borg...where's all the stuff you keep promising me? 

I am Erectile Dysfunctional of Borg... the Chief Surgeon of Borg said he could fix my broken implant with donations from family members. Trouble is, the bastard put grandad's bit in the middle.

I am Former Straight Shooter of Borg... you're complaining?  My implant has become teribbly bent... so to save me the trouble, I put it in double... and instead of coming I went.

I am Pacydermis Implantus of Borg... you blokes have nothing on me!  My implant was replaced with a piece of elephant trunk after a nasty assimilation accident... now when I go to the zoo, it'll burst out of my pants and shove peanuts up my butt.

I am Chief Surgeon of Borg... I have good new for you blokes... and I have bad news.  The good news is that I have invented the bionic implant.  The bad news is that you'll only be able to assimilate like Major Steve Austin running... in slow motion, and it will take you all night to do what you did all night.

I'm a relic of Borg... this thread is SO yesterday.

I am archaeologist of Borg... sorry, Relic for disturbing you., I'll pop you back in your sacophagus momentarily.

I am Historian of Borg... without yesterday we wouldn't be where we are today, it's just that we have collected too many relics along the way and now some are gathering dust.

I am wine in the basement of Borg...Like yeah this is not  good

I am Caster Semanya of Borg... really, I don't know what all the fuss is about.  It's not like my 'third leg' helps me run any faster.

I am Carl Lewis of Borg... I know exactly what you mean.  I found mine slowed me down if I didn't tuck it between my legs.

I am Olympic Drug Cheat of Borg... that's why I took performance enhancing drugs, my 'third leg' slowed me down a lot.

I am Cathy Freeman of Borg... that's why I ran so fast.  Olympic Drug Cheat of Borg showed me his enormous 'third leg'

I am Phallicsimble of Borg......You guys ain't got nuttin' on me. Why...I can implant at thirty Klicks without anyone knowin' it

I am MRS. Phallicsimble of Borg......Arthur...what did I tell you about bragging? You know better than that. Besides...I don't want no one knowin' that I can...never mind.

I am Lucretia Borgia of Borg...I have a playroom with all kinds of goodies if anyone's interested.

I am Loctus Incontinentus of Borg.... sometimes I need to tie a knot in my implant.

I am Victor Borge of Borg... I can play the piano with my implant.

I am Long Dong Silver of Borg... and by golly my implant's a whopper... once 'round the deck, twice 'round my neck and in my ear for a stopper.

I am LMAO of Borg...In one ear and out the other? Is that it?

I am Responder of Borg...Yeah.

I am H2T of Borg...bet ya don't know what means.

I am 2of3 of Borg...betcha I do.

I am H2T of Borg...well...