I am Gordon Ramsay of Borg... I wish now that I hadn't used the 'assimilate' word so prolificly on my shows, cos I've become so unpopular my restaraunts are going broke.

I am Master Chef of Borg... don't be so melodramatic, Ramsay, it's cos you can't effing cook.

I am Food Connoisuer of Borg... you got it in one, Master Chef, that effer can't cook for nuts.

I am Mrs Ramsay of Borg... Gordon, you effing idiot, you're going broke because of all those female kitchen-hands you assimilated.

Mrs. Ramsay of Borg...I am Culinary Extraordinaire of Borg...Please come and get your hubby. Those hands he assimilated are sticking out of places that do not belong in the food prep areas. Failure to do so will result in the re-assimilation of all those female kitchen hands and I don't need any more.

Master Chef of Borg...Don't do it!!!! I told you Ramsay is a cookers nightmare but do you listen to me? Oh no...you insisted on hiring that ne'er-do-well. Now look what he's done. My poor kitchen

Gordon Ramsay of Borg...YOU"RE FIRED!!! Turn in your implant! 2of3 needs a new one.

I am David Beckham of Borg... Ramsay can't cook, couldn't effing play football, neither.

I am Posh Beckham of Borg.... oh, I don't know, if Gordon Ramsay wined and dined me in one of his restaraunts, maybe I would assimilate him.

I am Scary Spice of Borg.... oooohh, me too!  I hear he's much handier with his implant than he is with a spatula.

I am Baby Spice of Borg... you girls are rude! Um, like wots assimilate, anyway.

I am Sporty Spice of Borg... bugger Gordon Ramsay, I want Davey Beckham.  Sorry, Posh, but I should have assimilated him, not you... Sporty goes a lot better wiv a footballer than Posh does, so there.

I am Ginger Spice of Borg... and I think you bitches are all mad, wanting to assimilate a couple of has-beens who both dribble before they shoot... NOT in my goal!!!

I am Sarah Palin of Borg... and I have resigned as Alaska Governor because I am tired of assimilating the view of Russia from my bedroom window.  I want to go to Washington and see the 'Needle'...to assimliate that truly iconic American phallic symbol from my new bedroom window.

I am Barack Obama of Borg... Ah, so that's what inspired my predessessor, Bill Clinton, to stain the Oval Office carpet.

I am Hillary Clinton of Borg... Washington Needle my ass, more like Monika Lewinsky's needle-work on the zipper Bill claimed was broken.

I am George W Bush of Borg... Is that what those stains were?  And all this time I was thinking they were from Ronald Reagan's sneezing cos of hayfever.

tOO MUCH \C INFO IS DU.LL

 OYE

?crakcee

OK, luv you l8tr

I am sobered up of Borg...drinking in the office is no longer allowed. Federation rule #3456

I am Hungover of Borg... did I really assimilate that whole bottle of Jim Beam???

I am Curious Colleague of Borg... are those facsimilies of your butt in the photo copier??

I am Irate Wife of Borg... That's lipstick on your collar!! Now what have i told you about office assimilations ??

I am Dishevelled of Borg... why is my dress on back to front?

I am Janitor of Borg... orright, who filled the water cooler with white wine and... who's gonna clean this mess up?

I am Pleading Innocent of Borg... honestly, I spent the entire lunch hour in the cafeteria... ALONE!

I am Kahlua and Crown Royal of Borg...yup she drank us all up

We are the Collective AA's of Borg...resistance is futile. You will turn over all alcoholic beverages...hic...to us for...hic....re...re...re-hab-illitashuns...hic.

*DELETED*___by order of Moderator of Borg for illlicit use of assimilation equipment with regards to said alcoholic beverages. They didn't give me any...WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

I am Thirsty of AA of Borg... and I've bin, hic, sober fer about.. um... hic....lemme take a look at me pocket watch here, hic... for about five minutes.

I am inebriated of Borg... and I have never been sober... well I hope not.  Staying drunk avoids damned hangovers.

I am Mrs Inebriated of Borg... that durned no good drunken husband of mine... if I've told him once I've told him a million time he a no good, fit for nothing, waste of space drunk when he's been drinking.... and what's more he's a low down dirty.....

I am Observant Neighbour of Borg... and she wonders why he drinks so much and assimilates so little.

I am google Chrome OS of Borg... coming soon to a machine near you to assimilate your personal information to target you with highly annoying ads.

I am starkers of Borg... not on my machine you don't.  I'd rather assimilate pooh!  

I am Grand Poobah of Borg...Assimilation required...CCWB is closing on our borders. Google Chrome OS...move your adfleet to bolster our defenses. RictusDictus fell last night due to immense starkerbark blast. Last Ditch of Borg says planet is greenish/brown gooey cheesey and slimed three times.

I am Last Ditch of Borg...I'm floatin' in a tin can 'cause CCWB skragged me ship. Please note...starkers of Borg is gearing up for a copious amount of Curried Cabbage. We can't hold out much.................................!

This just in...Pleading Innocent of Borg has captured Paris Hilton of Borg. Paris Hilton of Borg pleading innocent? The Collective AA's of Borg aren't buyin' it. Where's the

I am TWC of Borg..........all of your  weather widgets have been assimilated.

I am Lindsay Lohan of Borg.... I just love assimilating other people's fur coats when I leave parties, but womens underwear is next on my hitlist

I am Doc MD of Borg... do that in Hollywood and you'll assimilate crabs for sure.

I am Steven Spielberg of Borg... that's not in the script, but I'll use it.

I am Samantha Ronson of Borg... use any of my underwear on-screen in an assimilation scene and I'll sue.

I am Kara Thrace of Borg.....come over her so I can frakkin' assimilate you, Gods Dammit!

I am Gaius Baltar of Borg.......Please don't assimilate me.......but you can assimilate my imaginary friend. She may be hot but she's frakkin' nuts!

I am Imaginary Friend of Borg... bah, he assimilates with an imaginary g/f!!   And I'm frakkin' nuts???

I am Sigmund Frued of Borg... to have an imaginary friend is normal for those suffering a sibling defieciency, but it is prevalent in those who wear no deoderant and stink like a beetch,

I am Imaginary Friend of Borg... yeah, I told Gaius Baltar he should get himself a blow-up doll instead, but he refused to, saying that he has a latex allergy and his implant develops a rash.

I am Blow-up Doll of Borg... you're telling me he stinks like a beetch!   It's that bad during necking that even my passions are deflated

I am Conehead of Borg. I will assimilate you in mass quantities.

I anm opinionared of Boerg,  No.