Talk and Win (WC Charity Drive)
Spam is goooooood :)
Tuesday, November 6, 2007 by BX | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Hi fellows,
As you know that we are going through A WC Subscription/Chairity Drive). To help a noble cause and return a bit to the community I love, I have decided to put a little contest thingie. Just post what-ever you want (Provided not against ethics/WC Policy) and the 100th poster will get a shiny new WC Subscription or An extension if you are a current subscriber.
SO here we go .... !!!!!
(If somone wants to upsize the package ----- doors are open)
Edit: Modified topic so everyone would know what the thread was about - Zoomba
| Post # | Donated By | Won By | |
| 100 | BX | ilsabav92 | * |
| 200 | Fuzzy Logic | BookChick | * |
| 300 | Anon | NautilusIT | * |
| 400 | Anon | HAPTORK | * |
| 500 | Anon | killajosh | * |
| 600 | Anon | Cheated, cycled to 1000 | |
| 700 | ----- | ----- | |
| 800 | ----- | ----- | |
| 900 | NightTrain | Bobbyhundreds | |
| 1000 | Anon | Carguy1 | * |
| 1100 | Lantec | sAARGe | * |
| 1200 | Anon | Uma11 | * |
| 1300 | Jason Carver | ||
| 1400 | webby85 | ||
| 1500 | Quentin94 | 2of3 | * |
* - Subscription added to account.
 |
|
Page 9 of 78 | |
|
|---|
iNautilus
Reply #162 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:25 PM
Reply #162 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:25 PM
God as Computer Programmer
Q: How come the Age of Miracles Ended?
A: That was the development phase of the project, now we are in the
maintenance phase.
Q: Where will I go after I die?
A: Onto a DAT tape.
Q: How come the Age of Miracles Ended?
A: That was the development phase of the project, now we are in the
maintenance phase.
Q: Where will I go after I die?
A: Onto a DAT tape.
iBookChick
Reply #163 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:28 PM
Reply #163 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:28 PM
Isn't it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?
iNautilus
Reply #164 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:29 PM
Reply #164 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:29 PM
You've been programming too long when
When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...".
When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.
When your wife says "If you don't turn off that darn machine and come to bed,then I am going to divorce you!", and you chastise her for for omitting the else clause.
When you are reading a book and look for the space bar to get to the next page.
When you look for your car keys using: "grep keys /dev/pockets"
When after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number.
When you get in the elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want.
When not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your postal one.
When you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in octal.
When you dream in 256 pallettes of 256 colors.
When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D...".
When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.
When your wife says "If you don't turn off that darn machine and come to bed,then I am going to divorce you!", and you chastise her for for omitting the else clause.
When you are reading a book and look for the space bar to get to the next page.
When you look for your car keys using: "grep keys /dev/pockets"
When after fooling around all day with routers etc, you pick up the phone and start dialing an IP number.
When you get in the elevator and double-press the button for the floor you want.
When not only do you check your email more often than your paper mail, but you remember your {network address} faster than your postal one.
When you go to balance your checkbook and discover that you're doing the math in octal.
When you dream in 256 pallettes of 256 colors.
iNautilus
Reply #167 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:39 PM
Reply #167 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:39 PM
Signs That You are Too Drunk
You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Your job is interfering with your drinking.
Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alchohol stream.
The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
You sincerely believe alchohol is the elusive 5th food group.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not!
Two hands and just one mouth.. - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
You can focus better with one eye closed.
The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
You fall off the floor..
Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
Your job is interfering with your drinking.
Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alchohol stream.
The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
You sincerely believe alchohol is the elusive 5th food group.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not!
Two hands and just one mouth.. - now THAT'S a drinking problem!
You can focus better with one eye closed.
The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar.
You fall off the floor..
Your twin sons are named Barley and Hops.
iBookChick
Reply #168 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:39 PM
Reply #168 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:39 PM
A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"
"No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"
"No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms?"
sydneysiders
Reply #169 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:43 PM
Reply #169 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:43 PM
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
iBookChick
Reply #170 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:45 PM
Reply #170 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:45 PM
If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you see perfectly?
sydneysiders
Reply #171 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:45 PM
Reply #171 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:45 PM
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
sydneysiders
Reply #172 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:48 PM
Reply #172 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:48 PM
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
iBookChick
Reply #173 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:49 PM
Reply #173 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:49 PM
Mrs. Squiffy decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant."
"But you are not wearing any of those things."
"I know," said Mrs. Squiffy. "It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry, and I want his new wife to go nuts looking for the jewelry."
"But you are not wearing any of those things."
"I know," said Mrs. Squiffy. "It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry, and I want his new wife to go nuts looking for the jewelry."
iNautilus
Reply #174 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:49 PM
Reply #174 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:49 PM
Disney Password
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.
I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes.
I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long.
"Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
iNautilus
Reply #175 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:50 PM
Reply #175 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:50 PM
AT&T virus:
Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
MCI virus:
Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Politically Correct virus:
Never calls itself a "virus", but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus:
Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
Government Economist virus:
Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
New World Order virus:
Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
Federal Bureaucrat virus:
Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of your computer.
Texas virus:
Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
MCI virus:
Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Politically Correct virus:
Never calls itself a "virus", but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus:
Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
Government Economist virus:
Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
New World Order virus:
Probably harmless, but it makes a lot of people really mad just thinking about it.
Federal Bureaucrat virus:
Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of your computer.
Texas virus:
Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.
iBookChick
Reply #177 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:57 PM
Reply #177 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:57 PM
Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train Americans to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
iNautilus
Reply #178 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:05 PM
Reply #178 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:05 PM
Stages of Drunkeness
0 - Stone cold sober. Brain as sharp as an army bayonet.
1 - Still sober. Pleasure senses activated. Feeling of well-being.
2 - Lager warming up head. Pretzles are ordered. Barmaid complimented on choice of blouse.
3 - Crossword in newspaper is filled in. After a while blanks are filled with random letters and numbers.
4 - Barmaid complimented on choice of bra. Partially visible when bending to get packets of crisps. Try to instigate conversation about bras. Order half a dozen packets of pretzles one by one.
5 - Have brilliant discussion with guy on the next bar stool. Devise fool-proof scheme for wining lottery, sort out Denver Broncos defense problems.
6 - Feel like a Demi-God. Map out rest of life on cocktail napkin. Realize that everybody loves you. Call parents and tell them you love them. Call girlfriend to tell her you love her and she still has an amazing ass.
7 - Send drinks over to woman sitting at table with boyfriend. No reaction. Scribble out message of love on five cocktail napkins and Frisbee them to her across the room. Boyfriend asks you outside. You buy him a Slim Panatela.
8 - Some slurring. Offer to buy drinks for everyone in room. Lots of people say yes. Go round the bar hugging them one by one. Fall over. Get up.
9 - Head-ache kicks in. Michelob tastes off. Send it back. Next bottle comes back tasting same. Say, "That's much better". Fight nausea by trying to play old Space Invaders game for ten minutes before seeing out of order sign.
10 - Some doubling of vision. Stand on table shouting abuse at all four bartenders. Talked down by bartender's wives, who you offer to give a baby to. Fall over. Get up. Fall over. Impale head on corner of table. Fail to notice oozing head wound.
11 - Speech no longer possible. Eventually manage to find door. Sit and take stock. Realize you are sitting in pub cellar, having taken a wrong turning. Vomit. Pass out.
12 - Put in cab by somebody. Give home address. Taken home. Can't get key in door. Realize you've given address of your local gym. Generally pleased at way evening has gone. Pass out again.
0 - Stone cold sober. Brain as sharp as an army bayonet.
1 - Still sober. Pleasure senses activated. Feeling of well-being.
2 - Lager warming up head. Pretzles are ordered. Barmaid complimented on choice of blouse.
3 - Crossword in newspaper is filled in. After a while blanks are filled with random letters and numbers.
4 - Barmaid complimented on choice of bra. Partially visible when bending to get packets of crisps. Try to instigate conversation about bras. Order half a dozen packets of pretzles one by one.
5 - Have brilliant discussion with guy on the next bar stool. Devise fool-proof scheme for wining lottery, sort out Denver Broncos defense problems.
6 - Feel like a Demi-God. Map out rest of life on cocktail napkin. Realize that everybody loves you. Call parents and tell them you love them. Call girlfriend to tell her you love her and she still has an amazing ass.
7 - Send drinks over to woman sitting at table with boyfriend. No reaction. Scribble out message of love on five cocktail napkins and Frisbee them to her across the room. Boyfriend asks you outside. You buy him a Slim Panatela.
8 - Some slurring. Offer to buy drinks for everyone in room. Lots of people say yes. Go round the bar hugging them one by one. Fall over. Get up.
9 - Head-ache kicks in. Michelob tastes off. Send it back. Next bottle comes back tasting same. Say, "That's much better". Fight nausea by trying to play old Space Invaders game for ten minutes before seeing out of order sign.
10 - Some doubling of vision. Stand on table shouting abuse at all four bartenders. Talked down by bartender's wives, who you offer to give a baby to. Fall over. Get up. Fall over. Impale head on corner of table. Fail to notice oozing head wound.
11 - Speech no longer possible. Eventually manage to find door. Sit and take stock. Realize you are sitting in pub cellar, having taken a wrong turning. Vomit. Pass out.
12 - Put in cab by somebody. Give home address. Taken home. Can't get key in door. Realize you've given address of your local gym. Generally pleased at way evening has gone. Pass out again.
Jafo
Reply #179 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:07 PM
Reply #179 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:07 PM
I want mine to say "see I told you I was ill".
Spike did that already...
"Duirt me leat go raibh me breoite"
iBookChick
Reply #180 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:08 PM
Reply #180 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 9:08 PM
Will you remember me in an hour?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a day?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a year?
Yes.
I think you won't.
Yes, I will.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
See? You've forgotten me already!
Yes.
Will you remember me in a day?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a year?
Yes.
I think you won't.
Yes, I will.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
See? You've forgotten me already!
Please login to comment and/or vote for this skin.
Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:
- Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums and downloading skins.
- Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
- Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
- It's simple, and FREE!
|
|
Page 9 of 78 | |
|
|---|
Reply #161 Tuesday, November 6, 2007 8:24 PM
Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes returned with the lens in her hand.
"How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked.
"We weren't looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $150."