Hey! You Brits!
Sunday, July 14, 2002 by Larry Kuperman | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Let me begin by saying that I admire all things British.
I love your music- The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Led Zepplin, The Who, et al.
Your literature, from Charles Dickens and Jonathan Swift to Michael Moorcock and Neil Gaiman.
Your humour (note the "u" spelling, trying for a little local colour as it were) from Peter Sellers and the "Goon Show" to "Monty Python." I even liked the late Benny Hill.
Your cooking-- well, perhaps not ALL things British. But you do make good cheeses.
But you really must stop making up place names to confuse and befuddle us Americans. I see that the British Open is scheduled to take place at "Muirfield, home of the Honorable Company of Edinburgh Golfers, on the Southern Shore of the Firth of Forth." Oh come on now! There isn't really a place called the Firth of Forth! You just made that up so that Tiger Woods won't be able to be able to find it! Some taxi driver will laughingly say "Right-o, guv'nor, off to the Firth of Forth" and then drive him around in circles until they run out of petrol.
Next thing, you will ask us to believe that there is a place called Milton Keynes!
Now, I live in Michigan, whose name is derived from the Native American phrase meaning "Road under construction, expect delays." We have some odd names here as well. Hell, yes we do! (Referring to Hell, Michigan of course. People stop into the post office there just to send a letter from Hell. Very popular at tax season.)
I have lived in New York State, the home state of Quogue and Chautauqua, and New Jersey, home of Hopatcong and Netcong (sound like Dot.coms not towns) and of course Bogata. (If some asked where Bogata is, how many of you would say Jersey? So I recognize that region has some odd-named towns.
But there is no Firth of Forth! (Is there?)
Got to go now, off to Ypsilanti.
I love your music- The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Led Zepplin, The Who, et al.
Your literature, from Charles Dickens and Jonathan Swift to Michael Moorcock and Neil Gaiman.
Your humour (note the "u" spelling, trying for a little local colour as it were) from Peter Sellers and the "Goon Show" to "Monty Python." I even liked the late Benny Hill.
Your cooking-- well, perhaps not ALL things British. But you do make good cheeses.
But you really must stop making up place names to confuse and befuddle us Americans. I see that the British Open is scheduled to take place at "Muirfield, home of the Honorable Company of Edinburgh Golfers, on the Southern Shore of the Firth of Forth." Oh come on now! There isn't really a place called the Firth of Forth! You just made that up so that Tiger Woods won't be able to be able to find it! Some taxi driver will laughingly say "Right-o, guv'nor, off to the Firth of Forth" and then drive him around in circles until they run out of petrol.
Next thing, you will ask us to believe that there is a place called Milton Keynes!
Now, I live in Michigan, whose name is derived from the Native American phrase meaning "Road under construction, expect delays." We have some odd names here as well. Hell, yes we do! (Referring to Hell, Michigan of course. People stop into the post office there just to send a letter from Hell. Very popular at tax season.)
I have lived in New York State, the home state of Quogue and Chautauqua, and New Jersey, home of Hopatcong and Netcong (sound like Dot.coms not towns) and of course Bogata. (If some asked where Bogata is, how many of you would say Jersey? So I recognize that region has some odd-named towns.
But there is no Firth of Forth! (Is there?)
Got to go now, off to Ypsilanti.
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Woodbridge
Reply #2 Sunday, July 14, 2002 1:18 PM
Reply #2 Sunday, July 14, 2002 1:18 PM
'ere stop lumpin' us with them bloody Scots 
Its all their fault.
Its all their fault. 
BoXXi
Reply #3 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:05 PM
Reply #3 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:05 PM
O.K., here goes........
A firth is a stretch of water, or more typically a bay or inlet. The river Forth empties into a bay in Scotland, hence the Firth of Forth. There is also the famous Forth Road Bridge, which crosses the aforementioned Firth, linking Inverkeithing with South Queensferry. Other places of interest situated around the Firth of Forth include, Musselburgh, Cockenzie, Pittenweem, Cowdenbeath, Clackmannon and Prestonpans.
Now I'm sure most of you Yanks know of Loch Ness?, well "Loch" is the Scottish way of saying "Lake", and Loch Ness empties into the sea at Moray Firth. Dotted along the edge of Loch Ness are some interesting places, such as, Inverfarigaig, Drumnadrochit and Inchnacardoch. Now, when you look at the evidence I just presented, does Firth of Forth really sound that strange? I rest my case Your Honour!
Milton Keynes is somewhat an anomaly here in England. It was the first city in England to be built using the grid system, like many American cities. Now, just outside of that city you will find towns such as Leighton Buzzard(!), Leckhampstead, Ampthill and Flitwick. Need I go on?
I am often astounded at some of the place names in England, but seeing as how we had our butts kicked so many times in the past, (We were conqured by just about everyone at some time) it's not that surprising.
Anything else Larry?
A firth is a stretch of water, or more typically a bay or inlet. The river Forth empties into a bay in Scotland, hence the Firth of Forth. There is also the famous Forth Road Bridge, which crosses the aforementioned Firth, linking Inverkeithing with South Queensferry. Other places of interest situated around the Firth of Forth include, Musselburgh, Cockenzie, Pittenweem, Cowdenbeath, Clackmannon and Prestonpans.
Now I'm sure most of you Yanks know of Loch Ness?, well "Loch" is the Scottish way of saying "Lake", and Loch Ness empties into the sea at Moray Firth. Dotted along the edge of Loch Ness are some interesting places, such as, Inverfarigaig, Drumnadrochit and Inchnacardoch. Now, when you look at the evidence I just presented, does Firth of Forth really sound that strange? I rest my case Your Honour!
Milton Keynes is somewhat an anomaly here in England. It was the first city in England to be built using the grid system, like many American cities. Now, just outside of that city you will find towns such as Leighton Buzzard(!), Leckhampstead, Ampthill and Flitwick. Need I go on?
I am often astounded at some of the place names in England, but seeing as how we had our butts kicked so many times in the past, (We were conqured by just about everyone at some time) it's not that surprising.
Anything else Larry?
Valhalla
Reply #4 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:26 PM
Reply #4 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:26 PM
What a wonderful observation Larry
Now - back to house-hunting in my fav British name "Ashby-de-la-Zouche"
Not kidding!!!!!
Now - back to house-hunting in my fav British name "Ashby-de-la-Zouche"
Not kidding!!!!!
Larry Kuperman
Reply #5 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:31 PM
Reply #5 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:31 PM
Okay, now how does Peter Firth tie into all this?
And Woodbridge let me say -- "Oi!"
And Woodbridge let me say -- "Oi!"
BoXXi
Reply #6 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:43 PM
Reply #6 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:43 PM
Peter Firth used to live about five minutes from my house when he was still a child actor. He probably lives in L.A. now! 
Larry Kuperman
Reply #7 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:45 PM
Reply #7 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:45 PM
Hey! Check this out:
http://www.cnn.com/US/9605/30/geography.bee/
I am not the only one!
BoXXi, didn't either Genesis or King Crimson or Robert Fripp have a song entitled the Firth of Forth?
http://www.cnn.com/US/9605/30/geography.bee/
I am not the only one!
BoXXi, didn't either Genesis or King Crimson or Robert Fripp have a song entitled the Firth of Forth?
BoXXi
Reply #8 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:51 PM
Reply #8 Sunday, July 14, 2002 2:51 PM
Probably!, but I can only think of a song called "The fog on the Tyne".
fearoffours
Reply #9 Sunday, July 14, 2002 6:01 PM
Reply #9 Sunday, July 14, 2002 6:01 PM
hey Ashby-de-la-Zouche had cult status with me and my swife and some other of our universitiy frineds for a long time. We visisted there one day. It has a castle and some nice pubs. And a crisp factory (thats potaot chips for you americans). Said factpory was the initial reason for its cult status. WQe used to have competitions in pubs trying to name the place of manufacture tof the snacks behind the bar.... hours of fun .....
Larry Kuperman
Reply #10 Sunday, July 14, 2002 7:26 PM
Reply #10 Sunday, July 14, 2002 7:26 PM
BoXXi, check out Genesis Selling England by the Pound. Indeed there is a song Firth of Fifth, so I was close.
I have a "funny named place" story. In upstate New York there is a town named Poughkeepsie. It is pronounced Puh-kip-see. One day a father and son are driving through. The son, just learning to read, sounds it out as Pow-keep-sy. The father laughingly corrects his son. The son, however, displays the stubborness of youth and insists that he is right. Well, the father to prove his point says that they will ask a local how the town's name should be pronounced. He gets off the road and they stop at a restaurant.
The father, young son on tow, walks up to a waiter at the restaurant and says "My son and I are having an argument about how to pronounce the name of this place. Would you be so kind as to tell us how you pronounce it?"
The waiter slowly and deliberately pronounces the name as below:
"McDonalds."
I have a "funny named place" story. In upstate New York there is a town named Poughkeepsie. It is pronounced Puh-kip-see. One day a father and son are driving through. The son, just learning to read, sounds it out as Pow-keep-sy. The father laughingly corrects his son. The son, however, displays the stubborness of youth and insists that he is right. Well, the father to prove his point says that they will ask a local how the town's name should be pronounced. He gets off the road and they stop at a restaurant.
The father, young son on tow, walks up to a waiter at the restaurant and says "My son and I are having an argument about how to pronounce the name of this place. Would you be so kind as to tell us how you pronounce it?"
The waiter slowly and deliberately pronounces the name as below:
"McDonalds."
Jafo
Reply #11 Sunday, July 14, 2002 7:46 PM
Reply #11 Sunday, July 14, 2002 7:46 PM
Of course, Aussies not wanting to be left out of the weird-names race...and being a bit slow on the up-take tend to repeat themselves...so we get 'Wagga Wagga' [pronounced wog-uh wog-uh]...and nothing to do with a post-war influx of European immigrants....
UBoB
Reply #12 Sunday, July 14, 2002 8:09 PM
Reply #12 Sunday, July 14, 2002 8:09 PM
Canada is not without it's humorous place names.
Here is my short list:
Baie de Ha! Ha!
This is a small settlement in Quebec. The English name is "Ha! Ha! Bay". I've never found an explanation...
Happy Valley/Goose Bay
This is a town in Newfoundland's Labrador region. If you're there, you're either a local, in the army, or on a runway.(It's a last chance fueling stop for overseas flights)
Head-smashed-in Buffalo Jump
For millennia, native tribes on the Prairie herded buffalo over cliffs in southern Alberta. This one supposedly got its name when a fellow stood at the bottom for some reason, and got his head smashed in.
Kitchener
This name's not actually funny unless you know that it was named for a fellow in the British army who caused thedeaths of thousands of Canadian soldiers.
Moose Factory
A really baffling name until you learn that all of the 'factory' towns were places where factors from the trading companies that opened western Canada to Europeans set up shop. The factors bought furs from native and metis ('half-blood') populations in exchange for disease and liquor.
Moose Jaw
A city on the Prairies. You pass through it on the transcanada highway.
Salmon Arm
It seems strange until you realize that an arm is a length of water sticking inland from the sea. Salmon Arm is on the west coast, just north of Canada.
Here is my short list:
Baie de Ha! Ha!
This is a small settlement in Quebec. The English name is "Ha! Ha! Bay". I've never found an explanation...
Happy Valley/Goose Bay
This is a town in Newfoundland's Labrador region. If you're there, you're either a local, in the army, or on a runway.(It's a last chance fueling stop for overseas flights)
Head-smashed-in Buffalo Jump
For millennia, native tribes on the Prairie herded buffalo over cliffs in southern Alberta. This one supposedly got its name when a fellow stood at the bottom for some reason, and got his head smashed in.
Kitchener
This name's not actually funny unless you know that it was named for a fellow in the British army who caused thedeaths of thousands of Canadian soldiers.
Moose Factory
A really baffling name until you learn that all of the 'factory' towns were places where factors from the trading companies that opened western Canada to Europeans set up shop. The factors bought furs from native and metis ('half-blood') populations in exchange for disease and liquor.
Moose Jaw
A city on the Prairies. You pass through it on the transcanada highway.
Salmon Arm
It seems strange until you realize that an arm is a length of water sticking inland from the sea. Salmon Arm is on the west coast, just north of Canada.
Chef Garry
Reply #13 Sunday, July 14, 2002 11:53 PM
Reply #13 Sunday, July 14, 2002 11:53 PM
Speaking of odd Canadian names, how about Medicine Hat, Moose Jaw and Red Deer?
Chef Garry
Reply #14 Sunday, July 14, 2002 11:53 PM
Reply #14 Sunday, July 14, 2002 11:53 PM
Speaking of odd Canadian names, how about Medicine Hat, Moose Jaw and Red Deer?
Jafo
Reply #15 Monday, July 15, 2002 1:10 AM
Reply #15 Monday, July 15, 2002 1:10 AM
Back when there were no speed limits in Oz....the signs on entering towns would usually say, eg. 'Violet Town - Slow down'....which is OK until you're entering 'Speed'....
grayhaze
Reply #17 Monday, July 15, 2002 7:26 AM
Reply #17 Monday, July 15, 2002 7:26 AM
Speaking of strange names, you Yanks aren't much better. What about Chip, Chad, Zeke or Zane? Or maybe I'm just misunderstanding... 
KarmaGirl
Reply #18 Monday, July 15, 2002 9:04 AM
Reply #18 Monday, July 15, 2002 9:04 AM
You can find both "Paradise" and "Hell" in Michigan.
I live in Manchester (Michigan)
We have an "Iron" area: Ironwood, Iron River, Iron Mountain (Which isn't really a mountain). All in Iron County. (In the Upper Penninsula)
I grew up in Boyne City (Which has a river named "Boyne".....I'm sure it was established before the one in Ireland! )
I live in Manchester (Michigan)
We have an "Iron" area: Ironwood, Iron River, Iron Mountain (Which isn't really a mountain). All in Iron County. (In the Upper Penninsula)
I grew up in Boyne City (Which has a river named "Boyne".....I'm sure it was established before the one in Ireland!
)
Larry Kuperman
Reply #19 Monday, July 15, 2002 9:05 PM
Reply #19 Monday, July 15, 2002 9:05 PM
Grayhaze, we are talking about funny-named places, not people. (Although Milton Keynes works in both categories.)
Now some names are funny on their own, others is context. We forgot to mention that Hell, Michigan indeed freezes over. Or that Manhattan is also in Kansas and Scotland is in Arkansas. Oi!
You can also find a large number of places in America called "Jackass."
Now some names are funny on their own, others is context. We forgot to mention that Hell, Michigan indeed freezes over. Or that Manhattan is also in Kansas and Scotland is in Arkansas. Oi!
You can also find a large number of places in America called "Jackass."
BoXXi
Reply #20 Monday, July 15, 2002 11:06 PM
Reply #20 Monday, July 15, 2002 11:06 PM
One day, when I am fabulously rich,(Yeah, right!) I am going to found "BoXXiVille", and the whole town will be skinnable!
BoXXi goes off to design color coded roads to designate speed limits..........Huh?
BoXXi goes off to design color coded roads to designate speed limits..........Huh?
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Reply #1 Sunday, July 14, 2002 1:15 PM
Talk about, weird names, last year I visited the greater Richmond, VA area. Towns like Shortpump and Bumpass,... Wut up wit dat?