And unlike regular natural gas they won't have to put in the additive so you can smell it.  Starker's crude:NOT FOR HOME USE.

Ah, so that's what it was!!  Thought I felt some discomfort in the rectal region... the bastards have been illegally siphoning off my CC gas for profit. I'm goona have to talk to my corporate lawyer about royalties.

I'll say!!  Pirating from the pirate... it's just not on.  So not only will I be seeking royalties, I'll also mount a law suit for resource and intellectual property theft.  Yup, intellectual property theft!  It took countless man-hours of thinking to get the curried cabbage recipe perfected, so yeah, the resultant gas IS my intellectual property... as well as a valuable resource capable of powering the most sophisticated and powerful rockets beyond ours and neighbouring galaxies, those boundaries previously there due the the restictions of regular rocket fuel.

Maybe not an additive so you CAN smell it, but rather an additive that tames the pungent odour to some degree... if that's possible.  As for it NOT being for home use, perhaps there should be hazardous material warning signs emblazeoned in big bold lettering for industrial use... something to reduce the number of "I wasn't warned" workers comp claims.

The number of sindged eyebrows and nasal hairs just from using the CC blind may cause class action law suits.

Caution: Use with adequate ventilation!

Randy, that should probably be emblazoned directly at the source.  A tattoo just above the vent.

What tattooist would get close enough to do it?

Look out,, I'm goin' in for that tattoo job on Starkers.

So, you guys think you'd be impervious?  Well you'd be sadly mistaken!  Starkerbarks are capable of entering outlet valves.  So where the bubbles come out on that scuba suit, Ed, a starkerbark would see an entry.... and that Hazmat suit, Doc, well it depends on sophisicated filters to protect the wearer.  Guess what?  The people testing starkerbarks at NASA as an alternative rocket fuel have all reported noxious odours while conducting experiments...

Some NASA scientists reported fainting spells, dizziness and nausea while wearing the hazmat suits.  One poor unfortunate guy even fell into a vat of liquified starkerbark because he had a starkerbark induced upchuck in his mask and couldn't see where he was going.

So you see, you wouldn't be impervious... at all, no matter which suit you're wearing.  I suppose, though, a bankers suit would do the trick, being that bankers are constantly doing shitty things and can sleep at night with the evil stench of their wrong-doings which have hurt many moremillions than any super-triple concentrated starkerbark.

Anyway, seeing as I like you guys an awful lot, I'm gonna give you a tip, so as to survive comfortably in the event NASA has a massive starkerbark leak.  First off, you start with one small curried cabbage meal per day to build up your immune system - much like how the medicos use small doses of smallpox to vaccinate people - then you increase portion size over a week or so before progressing to curried cabbage twice a day... between meal snacks of curried cabbage don't hurt, neither.

Do this for a month or so and you'll be impervious to even the most virulent starkerbark. 

Happy munching, fellas.

The recipe for immunization described above will result in morbidity and mortality.

It will also result in a situation much like that in the Middle East: I'm referring of course to an escalating nuclear arms race.

Doesn't sound too healthy to me...

Hey, the guy in the haz-mat suit looks like he's got a woody.  Probably from lookin' at the Starkersbarker port.

I tried not to notice that... but obviously you are more observant...

... not to mention more forthcoming with your obsevations than I am.

Hmmmm, I'm gonna have to keep a vigilant eye on him, then... particularly in the NASA decontamination shower block.

Time to invest in some Soap-On-A-Rope... me thinks.

Gives a whole new meaning to docking station.

Yeah, but if I emblazeon a warning sign across the seat of my Hazmat suit: "Warning: Curried Cabbage, Starkerbarks Present", I reckon that I'd be safe from being 'docked'.

I'm gonna have to lay off the curried cabbage for a couple of days, tho... so's I can get a tattooist to do one on my butt. You know, for if/when I forget to take in my Soap-on-a-Rope.

The woody is really the left behind stuff similar to but not excluding U-235. Best take a trip out to Yucca before the close it. HEY!......what am I sayin'. Yucca Flats in my country...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

(Due to the nature of the fallout this thread has been detransmorgrified)

And there's no point trying to contain it in lead-lined containers and burying it like nuclear waste... the corrosive qualities of curried cabbage would soon reduce the lead to molten liquid and escape.

angus1949

reply 491

Hey, the guy in the haz-mat suit looks like he's got a woody.  Probably from lookin' at the Starkersbarker port.

 I'll not sleep this night. 

You won't Sleep this night???  If that Hazmat woody's on account of my 'port', I ain't sleeping... period.  Even a very temporary blockage of my starkerbark port is gonna pose the risk of an accumulative build up and a gas explosion.

Seems I might have to buy that box of matches to keep my eyelids open after all.

CAUTION!!! Extremely flammable...corrosive...radio-active...mortifying even. Woody killer! Only the Flubber Suit...(R) TradeMark of StarkerBark LLC, LTD, INC, INK, K-YG and other good stuff...can safely contain low-level (< 20%) CC gas. Any higher than that and...all gone!!!