Facts of Santa
Thursday, December 9, 2004 by Steve Grenier | Discussion: WinCustomize Talk
Here are some interesting facts.
No known species of reindeer can fly. But with 300,000 species of living organisms (mostly insects and bacteria) yet to be classified, flying reindeer - which only Santa has seen - cannot be ruled out.
There are two billion children in the world. But since Santa doesn't appear to handle Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Jewish children, his workload drops to only 378 million, or a mere 91.8 million homes averaging 3.5 children each, assuming that at least one has been good.
Thanks to time zones and the rotation of the earth, Santa's Christmas day lasts for 31 hours if he travels east to west, and visits 822.6 homes per second. This gives him 1/1000th of a second to park, race down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining gifts under the tree, eat the snacks, climb up the chimney and into the sleigh and fly to the next house. Assuming the houses are all the same distance apart - 0.78 miles - the total trip will be 75.5 million miles, plus bathroom stops.
So our jolly old friend is travelling at 650 miles per second, or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe saunters along at a poky 27.4 mps and the average reindeer runs at 15 mph.
The sleigh's payload adds another factor to the equation. Assuming that each child's gift weighs only 2 pounds, the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, plus Santa, who is always depicted as obese. On land, conventional reindeer can only haul 300 pounds, so if a flying reindeer can pull ten times as much, eight or nine will not cope. We now need 214 000 of them, which adds another 353 430 tons to the weight.
Here's where it gets juicy (literally)...
675,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates massive air-resistance, like that of a space probe re-entering the atmosphere. Rudolph, who leads the pack, will face friction that generates 14.3 quintillion joules of energy. Per second! In fact he will explode instantaneously, exposing the next reindeer to the same experience. These explosions will cause deafening sonic booms as the whole team is vaporised in less than five thousandths of a second. Santa will also experience 17,500 G-forces, which will pin him to his seat with 4,315,000 pounds of pressure. This will unavoidably mean that the maiden flight of Santa's sleigh will also be his last.
Yes, there was a Santa, but now he's dead.
No known species of reindeer can fly. But with 300,000 species of living organisms (mostly insects and bacteria) yet to be classified, flying reindeer - which only Santa has seen - cannot be ruled out.
There are two billion children in the world. But since Santa doesn't appear to handle Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist and Jewish children, his workload drops to only 378 million, or a mere 91.8 million homes averaging 3.5 children each, assuming that at least one has been good.
Thanks to time zones and the rotation of the earth, Santa's Christmas day lasts for 31 hours if he travels east to west, and visits 822.6 homes per second. This gives him 1/1000th of a second to park, race down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining gifts under the tree, eat the snacks, climb up the chimney and into the sleigh and fly to the next house. Assuming the houses are all the same distance apart - 0.78 miles - the total trip will be 75.5 million miles, plus bathroom stops.
So our jolly old friend is travelling at 650 miles per second, or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe saunters along at a poky 27.4 mps and the average reindeer runs at 15 mph.
The sleigh's payload adds another factor to the equation. Assuming that each child's gift weighs only 2 pounds, the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, plus Santa, who is always depicted as obese. On land, conventional reindeer can only haul 300 pounds, so if a flying reindeer can pull ten times as much, eight or nine will not cope. We now need 214 000 of them, which adds another 353 430 tons to the weight.
Here's where it gets juicy (literally)...
675,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates massive air-resistance, like that of a space probe re-entering the atmosphere. Rudolph, who leads the pack, will face friction that generates 14.3 quintillion joules of energy. Per second! In fact he will explode instantaneously, exposing the next reindeer to the same experience. These explosions will cause deafening sonic booms as the whole team is vaporised in less than five thousandths of a second. Santa will also experience 17,500 G-forces, which will pin him to his seat with 4,315,000 pounds of pressure. This will unavoidably mean that the maiden flight of Santa's sleigh will also be his last.
Yes, there was a Santa, but now he's dead.
GreatSilverWyrm
Reply #2 Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:23 PM
Reply #2 Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:23 PM
Pft, I guess somone has never heard of magic.
Hus
Reply #3 Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:49 PM
Reply #3 Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:49 PM
Ha! Santa 2.5 solves all these problems! They're still working on the G-Force thing though, look for it to be fixed in Santa 3.0. 
HG_Eliminator
Reply #4 Thursday, December 9, 2004 11:00 PM
Reply #4 Thursday, December 9, 2004 11:00 PM
all these mathematical problems can be solved with pizza....
Sleeping Dragon
Reply #5 Thursday, December 9, 2004 11:35 PM
Reply #5 Thursday, December 9, 2004 11:35 PM
I like Pizza!! Spread about 30 jalapenos accross the top and light it up.
Yes, Grenier. There is a Santa Clause.
Yes, Grenier. There is a Santa Clause.
Alternate Setting
Reply #6 Friday, December 10, 2004 12:24 AM
Reply #6 Friday, December 10, 2004 12:24 AM
He certainly isn't dead - NORAD tracks Santa every year and provides ongoing data on Xmas eve as to exactly where he is in the World.
http://www.noradsanta.org/english/downloads.html
(A nice site for the littl'uns to visit)
http://www.noradsanta.org/english/downloads.html
(A nice site for the littl'uns to visit)
Cyberworld
Reply #7 Friday, December 10, 2004 2:45 AM
Reply #7 Friday, December 10, 2004 2:45 AM
Santa exists, at least lil oh me is getting a present each year passing by and it ain't the parents. 
Erk.
Reply #8 Friday, December 10, 2004 4:01 AM
hehehe...
Reply #8 Friday, December 10, 2004 4:01 AM
| Ha! Santa 2.5 solves all these problems! They're still working on the G-Force thing though, look for it to be fixed in Santa 3.0. |
hehehe...
HG_Eliminator
Reply #9 Friday, December 10, 2004 4:14 AM
Reply #9 Friday, December 10, 2004 4:14 AM
as long as its running perfect before the deadline ......
Shem_Orion
Reply #12 Friday, December 10, 2004 1:54 PM
Reply #12 Friday, December 10, 2004 1:54 PM
No.... NO! Santa is alive! He does exist dammit! So does the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, Eskimos and Burt Reynolds! I know... and you guys are not going to get any presents this year. Look at it this way. If you're willing to accept that Bush won the election fairly, you're also able to stretch the realms of fantasy into believing that Santa exists and Mr Rogers wasn't mentally handicapped.
So naaah. Poo heads.
So naaah. Poo heads.
Steve Grenier
Reply #13 Saturday, December 11, 2004 11:07 AM
Reply #13 Saturday, December 11, 2004 11:07 AM
It's just a simple joke. No need to lose sleep over this
Dauthur
Reply #15 Monday, March 28, 2005 5:15 AM
Reply #15 Monday, March 28, 2005 5:15 AM
I've always enjoyed these kind of physic-based explainations to things so heavily debated. Like Heaven/Hell, and now this. It makes my day.
thomassen
Reply #17 Monday, March 28, 2005 6:18 AM
Reply #17 Monday, March 28, 2005 6:18 AM
Two words: "Quantium Leap" That solves everyting.
Please login to comment and/or vote for this skin.
Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:
- Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums and downloading skins.
- Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
- Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
- It's simple, and FREE!
Reply #1 Thursday, December 9, 2004 10:14 PM